It may feel momentarily satisfying to complain, vent and kvetch, but research shows these behaviors don't actually help. According to a Stanford University study, 30 minutes of complaining physically damages the hippocampus -- the part of your brain critical to learning, memory, and problem solving -- by peeling back layers of neurons. Unfortunately, that happens whether you're on the giving or receiving end of the venting. Offering a friend a shoulder to cry on may well bring you down rather than cheer your friend up. Even if you set aside the long-term physiological impact, complaining won't even make you feel better in the moment. A study published in the European Journal of Work and Organizational Psychology found that complaining actually makes you feel worse, both in the moment and for days after. That's because negative emotions are more contagious than positive ones. Moreover, co-ruminating with a friend or colleague won't blow off steam, but rather cement the incident in their mind. But how can you avoid co-ruminating with a friend or colleague? Shift into problem-solving mode! Listen carefully, understand what happened and ask, “What can be done about it?” That's the kind of proactive conversation that will be truly helpful. Has someone vented to you lately and did you proactively handle the situation? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.
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Everyday anxiety is something we all experience from time to time. But new research suggests there is a simple way to mitigate it: perform a small act of kindness. How can paying for a stranger’s bagel or taking in your neighbor’s trash reduce anxiety? Researchers at Ohio State University conducted a head-to-head test of anti-anxiety interventions. Over five weeks, volunteers were asked to do one of three things a few times each week: plan an enjoyable social activity, write about their challenging thoughts, or perform random acts of kindness. After the experiment, all three groups felt less depressed and anxious. But the group that benefited the most, and that showed a higher level of satisfaction with life overall, was the group that deliberately acted kindly. Writing in Inc., contributing editor Jessica Stillman points out the many advantages of this approach to anxiety management for busy managers and entrepreneurs. For one thing, it is easily put into action (no waiting for a therapist’s appointment or an opportunity to meditate alone). You can compliment a co-worker or offer someone your seat on public transportation easily. Kindness can also have a ripple effect. Doing something nice for someone might well inspire them to “pay it forward” and enhance your entire workplace or community. When was the last time you performed a random act of kindness and how did it affect your mood? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.
Giving, receiving or even witnessing gratitude has significant benefits. Numerous studies have found that having a grateful outlook, “counting one’s blessings” and expressing gratitude to others can have positive effects on our emotional health as well as on our relationships. Apparently, gratitude is the gift that keeps on giving. It has been shown to reduce anxiety and depression, improve sleep, and even generate physical benefits such as lower blood pressure. Now it turns out that even being an observer of a gratitude episode can be beneficial. Watching an act of gratitude between two people can cause an observer to feel more warmth and affinity toward them both. The studies on gratitude don’t indicate how often we ought to express gratitude or how best to put it into practice. One suggestion is to be specific when expressing gratitude: Instead of just saying “thank you,” say what you are thankful for, and why. Many experts believe that a small dose of gratitude, once a day, is enough to have a positive impact. To develop an enduring gratitude habit, try linking your gratitude practice to an already ingrained routine or do it at a specific time, such as first thing in the morning. When is the last time you gave, received or witnessed gratitude and how did you feel afterward? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. A new study demonstrates a startlingly simple way to boost your wellness and your happiness: Once a day, have a face-to-face conversation with someone. Building close friendships takes time and effort. Although the rewards of such friendships are great, you can contribute to your sense of connection, belonging and happiness with less. Just a single, amiable daily conversation with a friend or teammate can make a difference, according to this University of Kansas study. These conversations do not need to consist of soul-searching or deep revelations. Just a quick catch-up will do. A few guidelines:
Do you have daily conversations with a friend or colleague, and do you notice a difference in your mood afterward? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Are you able to have productive conversations with irritable, defensive people or those who profoundly disagree with you? Since this is an incredibly valuable skill for any leader to master, there’s plenty of advice out there. But remembering those tips is hard in the middle of a potentially volatile discussion. To assist in such situations, Harvard conflict management expert Julia Minson offers a simple mnemonic device. Next time you find yourself in a challenging, uncomfortable conversation, remember the acronym H.E.A.R.
No acronym is a cure-all. Still, research shows that learning and deploying the H.E.A.R. approach is worth the effort, if you want to be a person that people want to talk to. Which of the H.E.A.R principles have you used lately? Did it defuse a touchy interaction? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Have you performed a random act of kindness lately? In a study published in the Journal d Experimental Psychology, researchers found that when you perform a random act of kindness it’s easy to underestimate how much the recipient will appreciate it. And that miscalculation holds many of us back from doing nice things for others more often. We know that kindness can boost well-being, writes New York Times reporter Catherine Pearson. But researchers who study the subject hope these new findings will strengthen the scientific case for making these types of gestures more often. “I have found that kindness can be a really hard sell,” said Tara Cousineau, a clinical psychologist, meditation teacher and author of The Kindness Cure: How The Science of Compassion Can Heal Your Heart and Your World. "People desire kindness yet often feel inconvenienced by the thought of being kind.” On the other hand, even the smallest gestures do get noticed. So if you are not already in the habit of performing random kind acts — or they do not come naturally to you — begin by telling people what you appreciate about them. Also consider what you like to do, what skills and talents you have, and how you might turn those into small offerings for other people. How did you feel the last time you performed a small act of kindness, and how did you feel the last time someone did this for you? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Disagreements don’t have to be destructive. In fact, they often present hidden gems for you to innovate and grow. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Francesca Gino and Hanne K Collins of the Harvard School of Business, and Charles Dorison of Georgetown University’s McDonough School of Business, offer several evidence-based strategies to make disagreements productive:
Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Research shows that it can be less stressful to talk to someone when you’re walking side by side, with minimal eye contact, than conversing face to face. “When walking next to someone, a conversation becomes parallel play, with each person looking ahead yet connected by the exchange,” said Esther Perel, a couples therapist, author, and host of the podcast Where Should We Begin? To help people get the most from their walk-and-talk, New York Times reporter Jancee Dunn asked for some tips from Perel and Priya Parker, author of The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters. Here’s what Dunn learned:
When was the last time you had a productive talk on a walk? Do you think it went better than if you were sitting face to face? Things to think about over the holiday and get ready to try them tomorrow back at work! To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Many leaders think they are successful at coaching, but in reality lots of them are simply telling their employees what to do. Writing in The Harvard Business Review leadership researchers and consultants Julia and Trenton Milner point out that actual coaching unlocks an individual’s potential. Recently the authors undertook a study that showed how rare master coaching really is. But the good news, they say, is that most mangers can learn to be good coaches in a relatively short period of time. When first asked to coach, most managers tend to give advice or offer a solution. But this is actually more micromanaging than coaching. Happily, they become better coaches quickly by employing these skills:
In the ongoing study, the skills managers struggled with the most were identifying strengths as well as letting coaches arrive at their own solutions. Clearly, Coach Training must address these skills by changing mindsets and offering a safe space in which to practice and discuss personal challenges. What do you find is your biggest personal challenge when it comes to coaching? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. People often look to Warren Buffet for investment tips. So we took note when Buffet claimed that often the best investment you can make is in your ability to communicate. Buffett has stated that investing in developing your communication skills can "improve your value by 50 percent." Buffett says, "If you can't communicate…nothing happens. You can have all the brainpower in the world, but you have to be able to transmit it. And the transmission is communication." Writing in Inc., contributing editor Marcel Schwantes offers these tips for heeding Buffet’s words:
Do you agree that improving your communication skills has upped your personal value? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Do you think you’re a good listener? Most of us probably rate ourselves as “above average” in this area (a mathematical impossibility). Most people think effective listening consists of not interrupting, letting others know you are listening (uh-huh, mmm-hmm) and being able to repeat back what others have said. However, new research, conducted by Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman of the Zenger/Folkman Leadership Development Group, suggests that these behaviors fall far short of describing good listening skills. Their four main findings:
Not every conversation requires the highest levels of listening, but many conversations would benefit from greater focus and from the intention to listen interactively. When you are a listener, do you engage in these practices, and when you are a speaker, would you appreciate them? To join the conversation, click "comments" on above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning programs. “There are very simple things you can change about your behavior -- as simple as memorizing a few basic words and concepts -- to leverage emotions and increase the odds that you'll achieve your goals.” So writes Bill Murphy Jr., contributing editor of Inc.. Murphy contends that people with high emotional intelligence keep five simple words in mind when they hope to be persuasive.
Which of these words resonate most with you, and why? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Micromanagement gets lots of attention, but under-management may be just as big a problem. This is the term Victor Lipman, author of The Type B manager, has given to a constellation of behaviors that often co- exist: Weak performance management, a tendency to avoid conflicts, and generally lackluster accountability. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Lipman explains that results often suffer as a result. “Under-management can often fly under the radar because the managers who have these tendencies aren’t necessarily incompetent; on the contrary, they often know their business well, are good collaborators, and are well-liked.” The problem is they just do not manage! There are several intertwined causes behind this phenomenon, including too strong a desire to be liked and a penchant for avoiding conflict. If you suspect you are under-managing, try these steps:
Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Have you talked to a friend today? A recent study published in Communication Research suggests that people who engage in meaningful conversations may be happier and experience better mental health. Researcher Jeffrey Hall identified seven types of communication commonly found in social interactions: Catching up, meaningful talk, joking, showing care, listening, valuing others and their opinions, and offering sincere compliments. The researchers instructed over 900 participants to engage in any one of the seven types of talk on a given day. Some participants performed the tasks via online messages or phone calls, but most spoke in person. At the end of the day, the participants reported how good or bad they felt, as measured by feelings of stress, connection, well-being, and loneliness. The results showed:
While one conversation was enough to increase positive feelings, more than one was even more effective. And while conversations by text or phone call were helpful, in-person conversations yielded the best results. The final takeaway: Stay intentional about maintaining your relationships! Have you had a meaningful conversation with a friend lately, and how did you feel afterward? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Motivating employees is not about carrots and sticks, but about creating a culture that inspires people not only to do great work, but to feel great about the work they do. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Lisa Lai, moderator of global leadership development programs for Harvard Business School Publishing, says: “The better employees feel about their work, the more motivated they remain over time. When we step away from the traditional carrot or stick to motivate employees, we can engage in a new and meaningful dialogue about the work instead.” Her recommended strategies include:
Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. |
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