If you have ever had a teenager in your life, you are doubtless familiar with the “eye roll.” The exaggerated skyward glance is an especially common response to well-meaning advice such as, “Take a jacket. It’s cold outside.”
 
Parents and teachers may be offended by eye rolling, but perhaps they shouldn’t be. As Lisa Damour, psychologist and clinical instructor at Case Western Reserve University, writes in The New York Times, “Eye-rolling serves a variety of purposes, and the meanings behind the mannerism tell us a lot about what it’s like to be a teenager.”
 
According to Damour, adolescents hate being told what to do, and will reflexively resist suggestions -- even when they agree! They may take that jacket you suggested, but not without asserting their budding sense of autonomy with an eye roll. Or take a situation where an adult lays down the law and the teenager sees no point in fighting back, but still feels compelled to broadcast an objection. “Again,” says Damour, “ophthalmic calisthenics offer a useful solution.”
 
Eye rolls can also be employed when adults embarrass kids or have irrational expectations. Sure, they can be used dismissively or mockingly at times—but before adults over-react, they should consider that “more often than not, teenage eye-rolling serves as an efficient solution to the typical challenges posed by adolescence. And it presents adults with a choice: We can take the behavior personally, or we can try to see things from the teenage perspective.”
 
We want to hear: Is there a teen in your life who frequently rolls eyes at you? What have your best responses been? Do you recall doing this as a teenager? To join the conversation, click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion.

Wharton School of Business professor Adam Grant no longer grades his students on a curve—an evaluation method that pits students against one another, since only a certain number can get A’s. Instead, he offers bonus points on exams if students who do not know an answer themselves can identify which students do know it.
 

Grant, an organizational psychologist who is also the author of the book Give and Take, based his new approach on research, specifically:
 

• A comprehensive analysis of 168 studies of more than 51,000 employees across industries showing that the time employees spend helping others contributes as much to their performance evaluations and promotion rates as how well they do their jobs.
• His own decade-long study of jobs in engineering, medicine and sales, showing that although in the short run “takers” may be more successful, “givers” achieved better results over time.

 
Grant wrote in The New York Times: “Essentially, I was trying to build a collaborative culture with a reward system where one person’s success benefited someone else. It was a small offering — two points on a 120-point exam — but it made a big difference. More students started studying together in small groups, then the groups started pooling their knowledge.”
 
We want to hear: Do you believe you perform better in a competitive or collaborative environment? What makes the difference? To join the conversation, click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

Family businesses represent over 80 percent of North American enterprises, and like all organizations, have their share of conflict. But family business conflict that has to do with such items as goals, strategies and processes can be productive and motivational, as long as any relational/emotional components are well managed. So says a new study by Kennesaw State University and EY Family Business Services, which collected data from 25 of the world’s largest family businesses in each of 21 top global markets.
 
In the survey, nearly half the family businesses reported potentially dysfunctional conflict. It was how they dealt with it that made the difference between success and failure—not to mention family happiness versus interpersonal distress.
 
The report pinpoints specific traits that family businesses use to help reduce unhealthy conflict. Among them:

• Frequent communication
  
• Setting expectations
  
• Building a shared purpose and mission
  
• Developing unity through corporate social responsibility efforts
• Creating formal mechanisms for recognizing and resolving conflict

 
As we’ve long said, no business can or should flee from conflict, but instead mine it for its potential power to generate greatness.
 
We want to hear: Have you ever been part of a family business? How does your business address conflict and do you think it does so successfully? To join the conversation, click "comments" below on our Community of Practice Forum.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion