A new study in Science quantifies the spread of Twitter rumors. Previous research tracked rumors after specific events, like the false information that swirled around the Boston Marathon bombing. In this more wide-ranging study, a team of researchers at MIT tracked falsehoods and truths using a database of every tweet written from 2006 to 2017. Bottom line: False news moves through Twitter “farther, faster, deeper and more broadly” than the truth. (Tweet it!)

As reported in The Washington Post, MIT professor Sinan Aral and colleagues observed that, “even the farthest-reaching true rumors rarely spread to more than 1,000 people. But the top 1 percent of falsehoods routinely had audiences of 1,000 to 100,000 people.” Politics got the most attention among true and false rumors, they discovered.

The study authors hypothesized that falsehoods contain more novelty than truth. To that end, they measured the “information uniqueness” of rumors and discovered that false rumors were more likely to contain new, but incorrect, information. It's easier to be novel when you’re unconstrained by reality,” Aral said.

Have you ever been seduced by a false Twitter rumor, or even retweeted it? Why do you think you gave it credence? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

Why do most people quit their jobs? More than any other reason—more so than not liking their jobs or even not liking their bosses—it’s because they feel unappreciated. (Tweet it!)
 
According to a study by Accenture, cited by Forbes (https://bit.ly/2M0iwES), 43 percent of employees cite lack of recognition as their key reason for heading for the door. As Forbes contributor Alan Hall writes, “When your employees say to themselves and others, ‘Where’s the love?’ you’ve got a problem.”
 
We’ve spoken for decades about the positive power of appreciation. Telling people when their efforts have made a difference, and giving them the kudos they deserve is a powerful motivator. But beyond this, not doing so is a powerful deterrent to job satisfaction. Bottom line: You simply cannot overestimate the power of genuine and timely praise, recognition and gratitude.
 
Have you ever quit a job or been tempted to do so because you felt under-appreciated? How do you make those around you feel appreciated? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

A recent meta-analysis in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin analyzed 26 studies on work and friendship, concluding that teams made up of friends tended to perform better than teams made up of strangers. (Tweet it!)

That said, workplace friendships can be tricky to navigate. Jessica Methot, associate professor of human resource management at Rutgers University, has long studied such relationships. Her 2015 study also confirmed that work friendships are valuable, and that employees who experience “multiplex relationships” (i.e. genuine friendships with direct co-workers) receive higher performance reviews. But these same employees also tended to report more emotional exhaustion.

As Melissa Dahl, writing in the New York Times explained, “You’re playing two roles at once: friend and colleague. Friends unconditionally support each other, but colleagues can’t always do that, especially when their own reputation is at stake. It can be draining to have to decide which role to play, and when.”

Work advice columnist Alison Green, who answers questions about all sorts of uncomfortable office issues on her site Ask a Manager, says that if you are in an awkward situation with a work friend you are (gulp!) going to have to talk to them. It sounds simple, but we know how resistant many people are to raising delicate issues. Approached the right way, however, conscious conversations will strengthen bonds. Choose a time when you are not angry or tired, edit out accusative language, and work together to co-create a solution.

Do you have direct co-workers who are also close friends? How well do you think you communicate about sensitive work-related matters—and if you do it well, what is your secret? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

We’ve heard that failure is a necessary part of success. (Tweet it!) Now a study in the journal Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience adds a new twist. It finds that reflecting on past failures—by writing about them—may help us stay calm in the face of new challenges.

According to an article in Forbes  researchers from Rutgers, The University of Pennsylvania and Duke predicted that writing about a past failure would actually reduce a person’s stress level during a stressful situation in the present, whereas writing about a random topic would have no effect.

To stress the participants, they subjected them to well-known social stress tests, such as preparing a speech in five minutes, which they had to deliver in front of a “speech expert.” As predicted, people who’d written about a past failure didn’t show the typical stress response (measured by the stress hormone cortisol) compared to the control group, who’d written about movie plots. The former group also did better on the tests of attention.

Why does this connection exist? The researchers say that “writing about failures may make a new stressor seem subjectively less stressful by comparison.” In other words, reflecting on past stresses makes new ones seem not so bad.

Have you ever used expressive writing to help you process a disappointment at work or in your personal life? What was its effect? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

Have you asked anyone to give 110 percent lately? Or, to think outside the box? If so, your words might be having a counter-productive effect.
 
According to a OnePoll survey of 2,000 American workers on behalf of communications technology provider Jive Communications  https://wapo.st/2wZu20P, 27 percent of American workers acknowledged tuning out people who use this kind of jargon.

We’re all guilty of resorting to workplace clichés at times. (Tweet it!) In fact, 72 percent admitted to habitually using these phrases. As John Pope, a senior vice president of Jive Communications says: “These phrases aren’t going anywhere anytime soon.” But, he added, “Our goal should be to use such jargon sparingly.” (https://fxn.ws/2FhGmbl).

Here are the Top 10 phrases in order of cringe-worthiness:

1.  Give 110 percent
2.  Think outside the box
3.  Hammer it out
4.  Heavy lifting
5.  Throw them under the bus
6.  Don’t count your chickens before they’ve hatched
7.  Pushing the envelope
8.  Let the cat out of the bag
9.  Let’s circle back
10.  Win-win situation

When’s the last time you heard one of the above phrases and what was your reaction? When was the last time you used one, and how might you cut back? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

Countless couples will marry this June. Not all of them will live happily ever after. But there is a scientific secret to maintaining lasting and fulfilling relationships. Researchers say: Simply be kind. (Tweet it!)
 
“Longitudinal, experimental and evolutionary science all testify to the surprising power of kindness,” says Doug Carnine, PhD (www.feedkindness.com), University of Oregon Professor Emeritus and author of the book How Love Wins. Decades of research point to the centrality of kindness in stable, long-lasting relationships. In fact, kindness can even contribute to longevity itself.
 
A study of 423 married seniors over a five-year period found that those who showed the most kindness to their spouses cut their risk of dying in half. In one study, researchers created small wounds on the arms of couples; the wounds literally healed faster in couples that were kinder to each other. As one researcher wrote, “The benefits of kindness may be more important than what you think, more so than regular physical activity and following a nutritious diet.” 
 
Being kind might be easier than you imagine. Carnine contends that we actually have a kindness instinct. “It’s one of our four basic human instincts that has evolved over thousands of years. The other three are survival, success and reproduction. The title of a recent article in Scientific American underscored the importance of the kindness instinct: Forget survival of the Fittest. It’s Kindness that Counts.”
 
What’s the last kind thing you said or did for someone close to you? Can you remember receiving a kind act? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

It can be hard to say no, both because we want to accommodate people and also because we are sometimes insecure about standing up for our own priorities. (Tweet it!) Consequently, we can end up taking on too much, and perhaps avoiding people we fear will ask us to do more.

But Chikodi Chima, a former VentureBeat staff reporter who helps startups with their public relations and marketing, contends that saying no is saying yes to freedom. “Having the confidence and foresight to say no makes you stand out.  When you have clear goals, it’s easier to say no.” (https://bit.ly/2IiB6dX) Chima quotes Steve Jobs as an example of someone who used the power of “no” wisely. “I’m actually as proud of the things we haven’t done as the things we have done,” Jobs said at the 1997 Worldwide Developers Conference. “Innovation is saying no to 1,000 things.” 

Sure, we want to be liked and we don't want to offend. But in the end, don’t we also want to do what we truly believe in? If so, then “no” is one of they keys to success, says Chima. “The more clear our goals become, the easier and more powerful each no becomes. Saying ‘no’ takes practice, and it may backfire, but to me it’s the ultimate sign of maturity.”
 
When was the last time you said no to someone else so you could pursue what mattered more to you? How did that experience turn out? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

Loneliness at work impairs mood and health — and hurts productivity and the bottom line. The economic damage caused when employees suffer feelings of isolation may soon worsen as offices become more automated and more people work remotely (https://wapo.st/2ESB9qa).

The share of American adults who say they're lonely has doubled since the 1980s to 40 percent, says AARP. Though the U.S. doesn't track the financial effect of disconnected workers, researchers in Britain, which recently appointed a Minister of Loneliness, estimate the penalty to businesses can reach $3.5 billion annually (including higher turnover and heftier health-care costs). 

Among the loneliest professions: lawyers, engineers, and research scientists, followed by workers in food services, libraries, and education. Even though these jobs do involve human contact, a lack of true camaraderie takes a significant toll.
 
Social forces may be engendering increasing isolation, but awareness is key. (Tweet it!) Managers should actively search for ways to create emotionally open cultures, where employees feel safe to talk about issues and have opportunities to bond.
 
Do you ever feel lonely at work? What could be done to alleviate that loneliness? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

In a classic study, 80 percent of surveyed drivers ranked their driving skills as “above average.” The tendency to over-estimate our own skills is known as the Dunning-Kruger Effect.


In essence, this effect means the less skilled we are at something, the less likely we are to recognize how unskilled we truly are. (Tweet it!) We overestimate our abilities, and, worse still, our blind spot assures that we never know what we need to correct.

On the flip side is the Imposter Syndrome: Those who are exceptionally skilled at something can sometimes assume everyone else is at their level, making them unaware of their exceptional abilities. And the better we get at something, the more likely we are to see how much we can improve, which can lead us to underestimate ourselves.
 
How can we gain a realistic view of our capabilities? Writing in the The New York Times, editor Tim Herrara suggests two strategies:

• Ask for feedback. Outside input, even if tough to hear, is crucial to illuminating our blind spots.
• Keep learning. The more knowledge we have about something, the more we’re likely to identify gaps in our understanding.

 
Can you think of an instance where you overestimated or underestimated yourself? How did you do a reality check? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

Joining an organization means adapting to its culture. But most organizations don’t reveal their unspoken cultural rules to newcomers, and job seekers are often more focused on job descriptions, benefits, and new bosses. (Tweet it!) But organizational norms have a profound influence on an individual’s success. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Allen H Church, senior vice president of Global Talent Assessment and Development at PepsiCo, and Claremont McKenna professor Jay A. Conger list five dimensions of culture that warrant attention:

1. Relationships: Is work done collaboratively or solo? Are co-workers friendly and willing to help you make connections?
2. Communication: Does communication occur more through formal channels or spontaneously? Must you “pre-clear” communication through a hierarchy?
3. Decision Making: Are decisions made by consensus or handed down? Is there a bias toward taking action or for lots of analyzing?
4. Individual vs. Groups Perspectives: Is there a “hero mentality” that supports ambitious individuals or a propensity for sharing risks and rewards?
5. Change Agents: Does the organization want newcomers to “shake things up?” How quickly does it want change to occur?

 
No one will spell these things out for you, so pay attention! if you want to be effective and respected, notice not just what your colleagues do, but also how they do it.
 
Have you ever joined an organization where the culture took you by surprise? What adaptations did you have to make to fit in? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

Being called on unexpectedly during a meeting can be uncomfortable or even embarrassing. But it doesn’t have to be either. In fact, it can be an opportunity to excel. (Tweet it!)
 
Writing in The Harvard Business Review, Paul Axtell, author of the book Meetings Matter, says, ”Instead of hoping your boss or the person leading the meeting won’t put you on the spot, prepare yourself for this unexpected opportunity to shine.” His advice:

• Carefully prepare for each meeting and trust yourself;
• Start slowly and set up your comments (e.g. “I have three points to make”);
• Give yourself permission to think out loud (e.g. “There’s something I’ve been considering that I don’t have absolute clarity on yet, but I’d like us to think about.”);
• Have set responses at the ready, including:

            --“Please say a bit more about what you’re asking.”
            -- “I don’t have that information, but it’s important and I will get it to   you.”
            -- “I want to be sure that I understand your main concern. Is it…?”
            -- “Did I answer your question, or would you like to follow up?”
 
Have you ever been put on the spot in a meeting? How did you handle it? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

In the biblical story, what was Jonah swallowed by?

How many animals of each kind did Moses take on the Ark?




If you answered whale and two, know that most people do… even though they are well aware that, according to the Bible, Noah, not Moses, built the ark. Psychologists call this the Moses Illusion. Well-studied since the 1980s, this cognitive snafu is just one example of how we are bad at spotting factual errors. Even when we know the correct information, we often fail to notice errors--and will even go on to use that incorrect information in other situations. (Tweet it!)

Writing in The Washington Post  psychologist Lisa Fazio explains that while a glaring error would be spotted by most (e.g. “Nixon built the ark”), more subtle pieces of misinformation are likely to slip by. This is because: 1) we have a general bias to believe things are true; and 2) we tend to go with the flow and accept “good enough” information as long as it’s close enough to the correct information.
 
As Fazio writes, “Detecting and correcting false information is difficult work and requires fighting against the ways our brains like to process information. Critical thinking alone will not save us. Our psychological quirks put us at risk of falling for misinformation, disinformation and propaganda.” We cannot overestimate the value of professional fact-checkers who ferret out incorrect information in public view, she adds. “They are one of our best hopes for zeroing in on errors and correcting them, before the rest of us read or hear the false information and incorporate it into what we know of the world.”
 
Can you think of a time when you were misled by misinformation, and perhaps even passed it on? Why do you think you were taken in, and how did you learn the truth? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

What would happen if psychologist Abraham Maslow were to construct his famous Hierarchy of Needs pyramid with regard to the contemporary workplace? Top Facebook executives, in collaboration with Wharton professor Adam Grant, wanted to find out. After examining hundreds of thousands of employee survey answers, they identified three big buckets of needs: career, community, and cause.

Career is about the what of work: having a job that provides autonomy, allows us to use our strengths, and promotes learning and development. Career gives us motivation. (Tweet it!)

Community is about the who of work: feeling connected, respected, cared about, and recognized. Community gives us a sense of belonging.

Cause is about the why of work: feeling that we make a meaningful impact, identifying with our organization’s mission, and believing that it does some good in the world. Cause gives us pride and purpose.

Writing in the Harvard Business Review Grant and the Facebook team commented, “These three buckets make up what’s called the psychological contract — the unwritten expectations and obligations between employees and employers. When that contract is fulfilled, people bring their whole selves to work. But when it’s breached, people become less satisfied and committed. They contribute less. They perform worse.” 
 
Do you resonate with these needs? Are they being met at your workplace or, if not, what should change? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion.

Kacy Miller, President of CourtroomLogic Consulting, LLC, a jury and trial consulting firm, contends that every one of us has an innate tool we can use whenever we "put on our advocacy hat." That tool is our voice. "When used effectively," she writes  (http://bit.ly/2p8XLNu), "our voice has the capacity to maintain our listeners' attention, persuade, and even evoke emotion." Variety is the key. Some strategies to consider:

• Rate: We tend to speed up our speech when nervous but listeners need time to process what we are telling them, especially when the content is new, complex or technical. (Tweet it!)

• Inflection: Monotony can be yawn-inducing and annoying. Vary the energy and emphasis you place on certain words.
• Pitch: Research shows that higher-pitched speech conveys a sense of excitement, fear, or nervousness. A lower-pitched voice communicates confidence, certainty, and calm. We all have a natural pitch, but we can shift it up or down when we want to persuade.
• Volume: Know when to turn the dial up or down. Often, people only think of increasing volume to persuade, but don't underestimate the power of a whisper If you want your audience to take notice and lean in.
• Pausing: Silence is a great tool for persuasion. By integrating carefully orchestrated pauses into your speaking, you are essentially speaking in all caps. It's an easy, effective way to let listeners know that what you just said (or are about to say) is important.

We agree with Miller when she says, "We spend hours preparing content for a speech, opening statement, oral argument, or even a client pitch. Make the most of your delivery by adding a healthy dose of vocal variety to your presentation. Your listeners will appreciate it."

Think of a speaker you enjoy - do they make the most of these techniques? What about a speaker you don't enjoy? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion.

Keep your head up! The problem of looking down at our phones nonstop has both social and physiological consequences (http://nyti.ms/2DEfma8).
 
“Text neck” is becoming a medical issue that affects countless people according to a report published last year in The Spine Journal. The average human head weighs 10 to 12 pounds, and when we bend our neck to check our texts, the gravitational pull and stress increases to as much as 60 pounds of pressure (Tweet it!). That can lead to an incremental loss of the curve of the cervical spine.

Moreover, posture has been demonstrated to affect mood (frequent slouching can make us depressed), behavior and memory. It has an impact on our energy level and the amount of oxygen our lungs can take in. And our body language, of course, affects the way other people perceive us.

The solution: Sit up and make eye contact! Social media will still be there later.

When you look around, do you see people succumbing to text neck? Are you one of them—and, if so, what new habits can turn this around? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
 
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion