 Have you ever used the silent treatment? This “noisy” silence can destroy relationships — and there is a better way…
The silent treatment is intentionally refusing to communicate with someone. Writing in the New York Times, Jane Dunn canvassed experts as to its repercussions. Kipling Williams, emeritus professor of psychological sciences at Purdue University has studied the effects of the silent treatment for over 30 years. He and others refer to its use as “noisy silence” because the point is to demonstrate to the other person that they are actively being ignored. It might even include tactics like leaving the room when they enter — perhaps adding a door slam! Using the silent treatment can feel powerful in the moment, because it makes the other person uncomfortable. But, despite its common use, it can have long-term consequences in a relationship. Dr. Gail Saltz, clinical associate professor of psychiatry at the New York-Presbyterian Hospital, says, “The silent treatment is a punishment, whether you are acknowledging that to yourself or not.” That can destroy trust and fail to solve the actual problem. So what works better?
Have you ever given or received the silent treatment, and how did the episode resolve? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.
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 Framing things positively has enormous advantages… and there is one negative word you should consider banishing for good…
If you ask someone at Disney what time the park closes, they don’t exactly tell you. What they say is that “the park is open until 10 PM.” This is an example of what Debra Jasper, CEO of Mindset Digital, refers to as “positive priming.” And she thinks it should be applied to virtually every interaction. “Start with what you can do, not what you can’t,” she advises. If a client asks if you can meet at 2 PM Tuesday, they do not care or want to hear that you are busy. Instead counter with when you can meet: “I can make Wednesday morning work.” Or, instead of saying, “I can’t get that to you until Friday,” try, “I can get that to you on Friday.” Above all, Jasper says, there is a word you might want to banish from your vocabulary. That word is unfortunately. If you look up synonyms for “unfortunate” you get words like “grievous”, “dreadful”, and “disagreeable.” Is this really the tone you want to set? The next time you are tempted to begin a communication with “Unfortunately, I can’t…”, pause and rethink. How can you frame this communication positively? Hint: Start with the words, “I can.” How often do you find yourself using the word “unfortunately” and what could be your substitute? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. We'd love to hear from you! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Regardless of whether the word “writer” is in your job title, we are all writers—creating email, cover letters, reports, speeches, blogs, newsletters. Here are four tips to help you do it much better…
It’s easy to feel frustrated by the writing process, but it's also easy to boost your skills through some simple practices. Mastering the art of writing will help you be persuasive and prompt others to view you as smarter and more insightful. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Samantha Amber, author and host of the podcast How I Write, offers these tips:
What do you have on deck to write next, and which of these tips might help you most? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  When it comes to staying healthy, science shows that social connection is as important as diet and exercise…
The Harvard Study of Adult Development has been minutely tracking the lives of some 724 original participants (and some of their descendants) since 1938. One of its biggest takeaways is that the greatest predictor of health and happiness isn’t a factor like cholesterol levels or blood pressure. It is the strength of a person’s social ties. But social fitness, one of the study’s directors said, is just like physical fitness: You must work at it. Harvard-trained social scientist and author Kasey Killam has a framework for doing so, calling it the 5-3-1 rule. At a minimum:
Of course, these research-based guidelines can be flexed, depending on circumstances like age, lifestyle, and physical limitations. However, the 5-3-1 rule makes for a great baseline. Offering some helpful tips to get started, Killam suggests putting some friendships on auto-pilot with a weekly or monthly dinner, walk, or other activity. You can also put a post-it on your bathroom mirror reminding you to reach out to someone. You can volunteer in your community, or commit to a set number of 10-minute phone calls each week. These strategies can help you create new habits that, in time, will become self-reinforcing. Are you getting your 5-3-1 in, and, if not, how can you create a new habit to do so? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  It’s hard when someone you care about is upset, but asking them one simple question can help...
We can feel helpless when someone we care about is emotionally overwhelmed, and the last thing we want to do is say the wrong thing. Writing in the New York Times, Janee Dunn recounts the advice she got from a special education teacher. When one of her students is upset, she asks them: "Do you want to be helped, heard, or hugged?" Writes Dunn:, “It struck me that this question could be just as effective for adults.” Everyone handles emotions in their own way. And each option — thoughtful advice, empathetic listening, or a hug — has the power to comfort and soothe. A hug can release oxytocin, a bonding hormone that tamps down stress. Likewise, being heard with high quality listening has been shown to reduce defensiveness. Also, some research suggests that couples who give each other supportive advice create higher relationship satisfaction. Different emotions lead to upset and each may necessitate a different response. For example, someone experiencing anxiety may appreciate reassurance, but someone who is frustrated may rather be heard. And don’t try to problem-solve unless that kind of intervention is requested. Someone who is upset may already be aware of solutions, but they may want to process their experience before moving on. What do you most often need when you are upset, and how do you communicate that? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Trapped in continual “doing mode?” You’re not alone. Here’s how to give yourself permission to pause… and think bigger.
So many of us are focused on doing mode — achieving goals and checking items off to-do lists. But better relationships, bigger-picture strategies, and creative thinking all depend on pausing and entering into spacious mode. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Megan Reitz of Oxford University’s Said Business School, and John Higgins, director of research at The Right Conversation, share their research-based tips for making it easier and safer to occasionally switch modes.
When was the last time you deliberately took a pause to create thinking time, and what were the results? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. We'd really like to hear from you. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Setbacks are unavoidable. But these 5 steps can help you bounce back…
We have all faced it: We miss out on a promotion or a job offer, face harsh criticism, or fail to reach an important goal. Rebuilding your confidence after a setback is possible, but resilience requires reflection, patience, and proactive steps. Writing in Forbes, senior contributor Benjamin Laker offers this advice:
What have you done to recover from a setback in your professional life? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Friendships are so important, they can literally impact life and death…
Romance gets a lot of attention but, according to a growing body of research, friendships are critical to our health and well being. A review of 38 studies found that adult friendships, especially high-quality ones that provide social support and companionship, significantly predict wellness and can protect against mental health issues like anxiety and depression. Those benefits persist across the life span. Friendships protect to some degree by altering the way we respond to stress. Our blood pressure can lower when we talk to a supportive friend. When we have a friend by our side while completing a tough task, we have less heart rate reactivity than those working alone. Friendships can also change our perspective. In one study, people even judged a hill to be less steep when accompanied by a friend. Fortunately, research also suggests that friendships can be forged and maintained at any age. Even minimal social interactions can be powerful. So-called “weak ties” -- interactions we have with casual acquaintances -- can boost our health and sustain positivity. Isolation during the pandemic proved hard on nearly everyone, but it did focus scientific attention on how important human connection is across all ages and all spheres of life. Do you have friendships that nourish you, and do you actively make an effort to keep them going? Let us know if you’ve found a way to start new friendships as an adult. To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Valentine’s Day is approaching. To keep love alive, practice these 5 communication romance hacks…
Wall Street Journal relationship columnist Elizabeth Bernstein says her favorite part of the job is hearing people’s time tested tips. With Valentine’s Day approaching, we want to share some of her favorite advice with you:
What is your best advice for keeping your relationship strong through positive communication? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Communication is the lifeblood of leadership. So why are millions of employees exasperated and thwarted because of unclear communication from their boss?...
As more employees are working remotely or in hybrid work environments, the need for successful communication has never been greater. Yet, according to a recent report by FlexOS, employees gave their managers a mediocre 7 out of 10 — basically, a C — on managing hybrid and remote teams. Worse, 30 percent said they’re blocked and discouraged by unclear communication from their bosses. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Gleb Tsipursky, CEO of the consultancy Disaster Avoidance Experts and author of seven bestselling books, says, “As a manager, it’s your job to make sure vital information is shared appropriately and clearly, leaving no room for misunderstandings…” His advice:
Is your manager organized and thorough in their communication? What might they improve? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below.  New Years resolutions have terrible staying power. Here are 3 steps to be more successful this year…
According to Forbes, merely 8 percent of people keep their resolutions twelve months later. (You may have already noticed this happening, just 2 weeks into 2025.) The reasons for broken resolutions go beyond lack of will power. According to Elizabeth Grace Saunders, time management coach and author of How To Invest Your Time Like Money, many people fail to accomplish new goals because they don’t consciously eliminate old activities from their schedule to make room for the new. It’s like “trying to stuff more papers into a file drawer that’s already packed tight.” If your resolutions involve workplace goals and behaviors, consider the following:
What can you un- resolve for this coming year to make room for new priorities? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning programs.  Has your son or daughter become more monosyllabic as the teenage years set in, and far more interested in their phone than you? Good news: You can still break through with these 4 actions.
As Cara Natterson, a Los Angeles pediatrician and co-author of This Is So Awkward: Modern Puberty Explained told The New York Times, there are various ways to break through to teens:
When is the last time you had a good talk with your teenaged child, and how did you manage it? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. We hope this blog can be helpful to you over the holidays! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  If your job interview felt more like a dud than a win, don’t panic until you try these 4 moves…
Writing in Forbes, contributor Caroline Ceniza-Levine notes there are important criteria in deciding who moves on to callback interviews and the ultimate job offer. These include specific accomplishments that match the job description, your fit into the company culture, and your ideas about what you would bring to the role. Meanwhile, here’s what you can do while you wait:
Did you ever feel pessimistic after an interview only to get the job after all? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Certain phrases make conflict worse. So why do we keep saying them?
Writing in The New York Times, Jancee Dunn has curated some of the top contenders for phrases that ignite conflict.
Is there a phrase that triggers you? What wording would be better? To join the conversation, click on "comments" on below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Many employees are not engaged at work, but their leaders are often unaware. So what should you do if you know your talents, expertise and interests are being under-utilized?
Writing in the Harvard Business Review, organizational psychologist Lewis Garrad and Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic, Chief Innovation Officer at Manpower Group, offer 3 ways to communicate your dissatisfaction to your boss:
Have you ever been disengaged enough at work to request help from your boss? What was the result? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. |
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