![]() If your boss has unrealistic expectations, there are 3 things you can do rather than update your resume! Writing in the Harvard Business Review, consultant and professor Liz Kislik, offers the following advice:
“When all is said and done,” writes Kislik, “for as long as you stay in the job, you’re still responsible for helping your team and your boss be successful. And as frustrating as it can be to work for an unrealistic leader, your goal should be to satisfy as much of the organization’s mission as possible while maintaining your sanity and self-respect.” Have you ever had an unrealistic boss, and how did you cope? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.
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![]() Moving from managing a team to leading an enterprise is tough. It's different at the top, but how? Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Michael D. Watkins, co-founder of Genesis Advisers and author of The First Ninety Days, offers a breakdown of the key mindset transitions new leaders face:
Have you transitioned from manager to leader? What was the trickiest part to navigate? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() Research shows that expressing gratitude is not only fulfilling for the person you share it with, but we now know that it increases feelings of personal well-being for the giver as well. Gratitude is noticing what is valuable and meaningful to you. As the United States approaches our official day of giving thanks, perhaps all of us can focus less on turkey recipes, and take a moment to consider how we might make gratitude an ongoing part of our lives. Here are some tips offered for expanding our gratitude:
If you are looking for someone to practice your “thank you” with, start close to home. John Gottman, Executive Director of the Relationship Research Institute of Seattle says: “Masters of relationships have a habit of scanning the world for things they can thank their partner for. People whose relationships go down the tubes scan the world for their partner’s mistakes. What happens when you up your rate of thanks to people around you? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion. ![]() Many parents are stumped and troubled when their child starts tuning them out. Can this be reversed? Asked by The New York Times about how to continue to get through to teenagers, Cara Natterson, a Los Angeles pediatrician and co-author of “This Is So Awkward: Modern Puberty Explained,” and Dylan Gee, an associate professor at the Yale Child Study Center, offered this advice:
What do you do when your teen becomes uncommunicative? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() We all know how critical it is to make a good first impression, and how difficult it is to overcome a bad start. So what’s a surefire way to get off on the right foot? According to bestselling author and CNBC contributor Joanne Lipman, who cites research from Harvard Business School and Wharton, a great way to make a good impression is to ask for advice. This may seem counterintuitive. If we want to impress a new acquaintance we often talk about ourselves and our accomplishments. We rarely ask for advice — or, indeed, ask anything at all. Most people fear that asking for advice will make them look less than competent, but studies show it actually makes them look intelligent. At the same time, most of us think that those who ask for our advice are smarter than those who don't. This all makes sense from his standpoint of emotional intelligence (EQ). We usually feel flattered when someone solicits our knowledge and opinions. And flattery is a useful too for getting people to like us. As Lipman puts it "We tend to think: They were smart to ask for my advice because I am smart." Moreover, if someone asks you for advice or information, it's likely they've done the same with others. And if they routinely ask other people for advice and information, then they are probably well informed. Have you ever asked for advice during a first encounter, and what were the results? If not, are you willing to give it a try? To join the conversation, click "comments" on above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() How can being too positive as a leader reduce retention? An upbeat and enthusiastic leader can be a great motivator… but only up to a point. Some corporate cultures unintentionally prohibit worry or concern, even when appropriate (lay-offs, cost cuts, or hiring freezes are examples). Writing in Forbes, Jack Kelly, CEO and founder of one of the world’s largest global search firms, contends that when the expectation of joy is foisted upon employees, it can lead to burn-out and self-doubt. Says Kelly, “When dealing with problems at work or home, it may be mentally and physically draining to put on a happy face in front of your boss and pretend everything is fine. No one wants to be pressured to be someone they’re not. It’s disingenuous, and many people can’t keep up with the charade.” Kelly advises that no one should be hesitant to advocate for themselves in such a situation:
Managers must create a balance of igniting a positive culture while also acknowledging the concerns of employees, by reaching out to those who report to them and having open and honest conversations. Without this balance, retention will become rare, with quitting more common. Do you ever feel pressure to be positive at work no matter what? And what do you do about it? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() Are you dissatisfied with your job, but not in a position to leave? A recent Pew research study found that only half of American workers are “extremely” or “very” satisfied with their jobs. But let's face it: No matter how you feel about your job, quitting is not always an option. Writing in The New York Times, Christina Caron spoke with experts who offered strategies for hanging in there. Here are 5 actions you can take to improve your situation:
Are you temporarily stuck in a job you don’t enjoy? What are you doing to make it more sustainable? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() Are your ideas resonating, or being ignored? Perhaps it’s not the ideas themselves but their delivery. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Anne Sugar, executive coach for the Harvard Business School Executive Program, offers four strategies you can use to help ensure your ideas resonate.
Have you ever been frustrated with your ideas going unheeded, and what did you do? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() Have you been phubbed lately? “Phubbing" — a mix of “phone” and “snubbing”— is when someone pays more attention to their smartphone than they do to the people with whom they are face to face. Not surprisingly, research has shown that phubbing has a negative impact on relationship satisfaction and can lead to increased conflict. This is especially true with married couples. The good news is that researchers have also determined that effective communication skills can mitigate the impact of phubbing. Those skills include:
We cannot turn back the clock on technology, but phubbing should be seen as a problem. Addressing it by prioritizing face-to-face time and spending that time engaged in positive communication can help contain the potential damage. Have you been phubbed lately? How did it make you feel, and what did you do? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() Research suggests we undervalue the bonding and enjoyment we get from hearing someone's voice. We've all had the urge to reach out to someone -- perhaps someone we haven't communicated with in awhile and wondered whether texting, emailing, or calling would be best. A study reported on in the Greater Good journal suggests that there are reasons to pick up the phone and say hello. In the study, participants predicted how awkward or enjovable it would be to have a conversation with a friend they hadn't been in touch with for at least two years, and how close they'd feel if they connected by phone versus email or text. They also reported which medium they'd prefer to use. The results showed that, although most people anticipated talking by phone would be more uncomfortable for them, those who spoke on the phone were happier with the exchange and felt closer to the other person. "We think it's going to be awkward to talk to somebody, but that turns out not to be the case," says lead author Amit Kumar. "Instead people form significantly stronger bonds when they re talking on the phone than when communicating over email or text." Kumar continued, "There are linguistic cues that come through someone's voice that suggest a feeling and thinking mind. And since connecting with somebody means getting a little closer to their mind, voice-based communication makes that easier or more likely.' When is the last time you reached out to a person you hadn't connected with in a while, and what medium did you use? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() Actions are things we do — perhaps only once in a while — but identities are who we are. So by using identities to describe ourselves, we can influence how others see us (e.g. as a runner, versus someone who sometimes runs). Through this technique of adding “er” to words, we can also motivate others to perform better (e.g. “You are project leader” versus “I want you to lead this project.”) So say Jonah Berger, author of Magic Words: What to Say to Get Your Way, and his co-researcher Dan Pink. When children were asked “Can you be a helper in clean up?” versus “Can you help clean up?”, participation in that activity shot upward. When people were asked if they were voters, versus whether or not they would vote, many more were enthusiastic about voting. With any pursuit, in time you become the thing you are learning to do. But you can speed that learning curve along – for yourself and for others – by using descriptors that have to do with being rather than doing. Try it: You may well find it will require far less willpower for you and others to reach goals when you choose to embody the goal itself! What are some of your “er” identities, and what are those of the people you lead? How can you use these to influence behavior? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() Job interviews can be stressful, but being prepared will not only ease your anxiety but also set you apart from the competition. It almost goes without saying that you should research the company and, if possible, the interviewer, as well as updating your LinkedIn profile. But, writing in Forbes, Jack Kelly, founder and CEO of WeCruitr, offers some additional strategies for once you are in the room (or on the video screen):
How did your last job interview go, and can you share any advice? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() It may feel momentarily satisfying to complain, vent and kvetch, but research shows these behaviors don't actually help. According to a Stanford University study, 30 minutes of complaining physically damages the hippocampus -- the part of your brain critical to learning, memory, and problem solving -- by peeling back layers of neurons. Unfortunately, that happens whether you're on the giving or receiving end of the venting. Offering a friend a shoulder to cry on may well bring you down rather than cheer your friend up. Even if you set aside the long-term physiological impact, complaining won't even make you feel better in the moment. A study published in the European Journal of Work and Organizational Psychology found that complaining actually makes you feel worse, both in the moment and for days after. That's because negative emotions are more contagious than positive ones. Moreover, co-ruminating with a friend or colleague won't blow off steam, but rather cement the incident in their mind. But how can you avoid co-ruminating with a friend or colleague? Shift into problem-solving mode! Listen carefully, understand what happened and ask, “What can be done about it?” That's the kind of proactive conversation that will be truly helpful. Has someone vented to you lately and did you proactively handle the situation? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. ![]() Everyday anxiety is something we all experience from time to time. But new research suggests there is a simple way to mitigate it: perform a small act of kindness. How can paying for a stranger’s bagel or taking in your neighbor’s trash reduce anxiety? Researchers at Ohio State University conducted a head-to-head test of anti-anxiety interventions. Over five weeks, volunteers were asked to do one of three things a few times each week: plan an enjoyable social activity, write about their challenging thoughts, or perform random acts of kindness. After the experiment, all three groups felt less depressed and anxious. But the group that benefited the most, and that showed a higher level of satisfaction with life overall, was the group that deliberately acted kindly. Writing in Inc., contributing editor Jessica Stillman points out the many advantages of this approach to anxiety management for busy managers and entrepreneurs. For one thing, it is easily put into action (no waiting for a therapist’s appointment or an opportunity to meditate alone). You can compliment a co-worker or offer someone your seat on public transportation easily. Kindness can also have a ripple effect. Doing something nice for someone might well inspire them to “pay it forward” and enhance your entire workplace or community. When was the last time you performed a random act of kindness and how did it affect your mood? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.
![]() Giving, receiving or even witnessing gratitude has significant benefits. Numerous studies have found that having a grateful outlook, “counting one’s blessings” and expressing gratitude to others can have positive effects on our emotional health as well as on our relationships. Apparently, gratitude is the gift that keeps on giving. It has been shown to reduce anxiety and depression, improve sleep, and even generate physical benefits such as lower blood pressure. Now it turns out that even being an observer of a gratitude episode can be beneficial. Watching an act of gratitude between two people can cause an observer to feel more warmth and affinity toward them both. The studies on gratitude don’t indicate how often we ought to express gratitude or how best to put it into practice. One suggestion is to be specific when expressing gratitude: Instead of just saying “thank you,” say what you are thankful for, and why. Many experts believe that a small dose of gratitude, once a day, is enough to have a positive impact. To develop an enduring gratitude habit, try linking your gratitude practice to an already ingrained routine or do it at a specific time, such as first thing in the morning. When is the last time you gave, received or witnessed gratitude and how did you feel afterward? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. |
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