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Getting your Team to Go the Extra Mile

10/31/2017

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When employees go beyond their formal roles—helping out coworkers, volunteering for special assignments, introducing ideas, and putting in extra hours on projects, research shows that their companies are more effective overall (Tweet it!). So how can managers encourage employees to take on “good citizenship behaviors?”

Writing in The Harvard Business Review, Mark C. Bolino of the University of Oklahoma’s Price College of Business and Anthony C. Klotz of Oregon State University’s College of Business, note that it is important that managers help employees find customized ways to go beyond the call of duty in order to help make work more meaningful and fulfilling—not because they feel pressured. Managers should let their employees know what types of cooperative behaviors are most important for their group, while recognizing that asking employees to engage in too much service beyond their own work priorities can be counterproductive. Employees should also feel free to tell their managers what types of citizenship behavior are most consistent with their strengths, motives, and passions.

By realizing that not all work group cooperation looks alike, and allowing employees to tailor their citizenship to fit their talents, managers can enhance employee well-being and group productivity. But managers alone are not the answer. In the end, employees will likely be cooperative citizens when colleagues are appreciative and generous in return.

 
What kind of good citizenship behaviors do you engage in at work? How do you encourage others to be good workplace citizens? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion.

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Using Negative Feedback

10/24/2017

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Even though none of us relishes receiving criticism, it can have a silver lining (Tweet it!). William Treseder, a founding partner at Silicon Valley consulting firm BMNT, writes in The Harvard Business Review, we can use it to “slingshot” our growth.

Citing a personal story of being rejected by a Marine Corps recruiter and later being accepted after he lost 100 pounds, Treseder says that how we initially react to negative feedback can mean the difference between success and failure. We thwart ourselves, he says, when we take criticism of our behavior as criticism of our identity, when we are stubborn perfectionists, and when we cling to the fallacy that one person can be good at everything. To productively deal with negative feedback, he suggests the following:
 
1.    Embrace emotions – It's only natural to be upset. Let yourself feel that, but let your upset subside before moving forward.
2.    Don’t demonize: It's easy to label someone a jerk for criticizing you, but remember they at least made the effort to be honest with you.
3.    Prioritize: Sort through the feedback to see what’s worth tackling first.
4.    Piggyback on a skill: Target one key area of your behavior and see how you can improve upon it.
5.    Commit: Thank the giver of your feedback, tell them about your goal to change, and set a time to meet again in a month or so.

 
Have you ever used bluntly negative feedback to motivate yourself to improve? What was the result? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

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The Five Second Rule

10/17/2017

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In order to grow, we must step outside our comfort zone (Tweet it!). But as CNN commentator and bestselling author Mel Robbins says, knowing what to do and why you need to do it will never be enough. “If you don’t start doing the things you don’t feel like doing, you will wake up one year from today and be in exactly the same place.”
 
As Robbins explains, when there is an internal dialogue between what you should be doing and what you feel like doing, feelings tend to win. That’s why she posits The Five Second Rule:
 
If you have an impulse to act on a goal, you must physically move within 5 seconds or your brain will kill the idea.


If you have a goal of losing weight, go to the gym. If you have a goal of launching your own business, fill out a business plan template. If you are at a networking event, stop standing in the corner and introduce yourself. “Because when you physically move, your brain starts to build new habits. When you do something you’re not used to doing, you are in the act of building new habits and erasing existing ones.”

Have you ever overridden what you think was a good impulse (one aimed at reaching a positive goal) and regretted it later? What would you have done differently? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

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Learning From Rejection

10/10/2017

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Jia Jang recently embarked on a 100-day mission. He deliberately courted rejection by doing things like asking a stranger for $100, requesting a burger refill at a restaurant, and asking for a haircut at PetSmart. Jang publishes the website “Rejection Therapy”  and is the CEO of Wuju Learning, a company that teaches people and organizations to become fearless through rejection training.


 Needless to say, Jia Jang got a lot of “no’s,” but he got some “yes’s” too. Most of all he gained a significant amount of self-knowledge, as shared in his Ted talk.

  • If I didn't run when I got rejected but stuck around, I might be able to turn a ‘no’ into a ‘yes’. The magic trick was to ask, “Why?”
  • If what I proposed was not what someone wanted, they might offer to refer me to someone who did want it.
  • I was able to build trust by articulating any doubt the other person was having (e.g. “I can imagine you think this request is weird…”)
  • It helped to remember that people who change the world are often initially met by rejection…even violent rejection.

The bottom line, says Jia Jang, is not to run the next time you are rejected. Instead consider the possibilities. “You can fulfill your life’s dream by simply asking.” 

What’s the best lesson you ever learned from rejection? To join the conversation, click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum.

If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

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Disagreement: A Dying Art

10/3/2017

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When reporter Bret Stephens accepted the Lowry Award for excellence in Australian Foreign Affairs Journalism, he gave a talk on a subject dear to his heart: disagreement.(http://nyti.ms/2xCl4oA)

Stephens noted that the words I agree form the basis of community. But the words I disagree “define our individuality, give us our freedom, enjoin our tolerance, enlarge our perspectives, seize our attention, energize our progress, make our democracies real, and give hope and courage to oppressed people...” He cited Galileo, Darwin, Nelson Mandela, and Rosa Parks as among the ranks of those who disagreed.

But Stephens says we are failing at disagreement, expressing discord in ways that are increasingly virulent, violent, and embittering. He says our disagreements are non-productive when they are based on misunderstandings. Productive disagreements, on the other hand, “arise from perfect comprehension...”

What makes our disagreements so toxic is that “we refuse to make eye contact with our opponents, or try to see things as they might, or find some middle ground.” His remedy: “Shut up; listen up; pause and reconsider; and only then speak.”

 
When is the last time you actively chose to spend time with people you disagree with and discuss your differences? (Tweet it!) Did you learn anything, about them or yourself? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

If you would like to read more about creating a habit around communication mastery, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion.

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  • Courses
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