If you’ve been swearing more in the past year or so — even at work — you’re not alone. The corporate and financial research platform Sentieo recently combed through a database of around 9,000 conference call transcripts looking for expletives. They found 166 transcripts that contained them from 2021. That's a significant jump from previous years. Just 104 transcripts contained profanity in 2020, 112 in 2019, and 92 in 2018. So swearing at work appears to be up.  
 
Frustration with the pandemic and a work-from-home informality may both be factors in the rise of swearing. Our question: Is cutting loose with language always a bad thing? Experts quoted in Inc. say “not necessarily.”
 
Michael Adams, author of In Praise of Profanity, argues that swearing has many useful social functions including “bringing us together.” There’s an intimacy to profanity precisely because it is somewhat taboo. "Bad words," Adams writes, "are unexpectedly useful in fostering human relations because they carry risk.... We like to get away with things and sometimes we do so with like-minded people." Adams believes that swearing can also help us appear slightly more vulnerable and more authentic — both useful qualities in relationship building.
 
No one is suggesting you begin your next Zoom meeting by imitating a drunken pirate. But for those who are savvy enough to navigate delicate situations, an occasional swear word, science attests, may have genuine utility.
 
Have you ever uttered swear words at work, and how do you feel when co-workers do so? To join the conversation, click "comments" above just below the picture — we'd love to hear your thoughts!

Relationships with our co-workers are important, but instead of characterizing them as “good” or “bad”, we should acknowledge that they are always shifting.  Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Professor Kerry Roberts Gibson of Babson College and Professor Beth Shinoff of Boston College discuss how to use “micromoves” to build the work relationships you want, instead of settling for those you have.
 
Micromoves are “small actions or behaviors that seem inconsequential in the moment but affect how we relate to one another.” They are like the steps that constitute a dance, and each step can change its direction. A positive microwave (like saying thank you or supporting a colleague’s comment at a meeting) can have a resonating beneficial impact, while a negative one (neglecting an email or excluding one colleague in a group lunch) has the opposite impact. The following principles can help you make positive micromoves:
 

• Before you make a micromove, ask yourself how you would react were you on the receiving end.
• Ask yourself how an objective observer might narrate the story of your relationship with a colleague through the micromoves exchanged.
• Journal your micromoves. If there’s a relationship you’d like to improve, jot down your last five or six small interactions with that person.
• “Bad” interactions far outweigh those of “good” ones. So if you think you’ve made a micromove that may have damaged a relationship, try brainstorming at least six positive micromoves to offset it.

 
Can you think of a positive or negative micromove you may have made lately, and the results of each? To join the conversation, click "comments" just under the photo above.  We'd really like to get your feedback!

Research on resilience —our ability to bounce back from adversity — has shown that giving support to others has a significant impact on our well-being. Our bodies and minds benefit in a variety of ways when we help others, sometimes even generating a “helper’s high”.
 
In fact, the act of giving advice has been shown to be even more beneficial than receiving it. In a series of studies of 2,274 people, researchers found that after middle-school students gave younger students help with studying, they ended up spending more time on their own homework. Overweight people who counseled others on weight loss were more motivated to lose weight themselves.
 
In a New York Times article, Wharton organizational psychologist Adam Grant explained that we often are better at giving advice to people other than ourselves. “One of the best things you can do is call someone else facing a similar problem and talk them through it,” he said. Grant, who co-founded an online networking platform call Givitas, which connects people asking for or offering support and advice, added, “When you talk other people through their problems, you come up with wiser perspectives and solutions for yourself.”
 
When was the last time you gave advice, and how did it make you feel? Did it benefit you, or the receiver, or both? To join the conversation, click "comments" just above this article, under the photo. We'd love to hear your thoughts!

Conversations around diversity, equity and inclusion are actually just conversations about people. And storytelling, one of the most universal human experiences, gives us a chance to look through new lenses and gain new perspectives from co-workers who may have had different life experiences. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, inclusion consultants Selena Rezvani and Stacey A. Gordon offer steps to implement a story-based approach to DEI.
 
In this approach, employees are encouraged to tell and own their stories, and consider how they impact their experiences at work. For those who are unsure how to unearth their own diversity stories, the authors offer some possible prompts:

• Has your privilege afforded you different treatment than someone else?
• Did someone ever advocate for you? (Did someone with privilege help you?)
• Did you ever struggle to find your own sense of belonging?
• Did you discover a bias/privilege you had, and how did you overcome it?
• Have you ever felt pressure to conform or fit in?
• Did you ever witness an unconscious bias play out in the workplace?

“The best way to create a cascading inclusion effect in an organization is to offer safe spaces where stories can be heard without judgment,” say Rezvani and Gordon. To this end, they suggest round-robin questions in meetings, listening sessions, discussion-heavy book clubs, storytelling town halls, social forums and meet-ups, and social media campaigns that feature stories. Stories can also be included as a component of onboading.

As the authors say: “In our attempts to create more awake and aware environments, we’re forgetting that numbers typically don’t inspire us to change our behavior — people and stories do.”
​
How might storytelling based on DEI benefit your organization? Do you have a story you would care to share?  To join the conversation, click "comments" above this article, just under the photo. 

All day, every day, we are faced with decisions, from what to wear to whether to pursue a new job. Even deliberating in the toothpaste aisle at the drugstore can feel overwhelming. The pandemic added even more choices to our daily routine, as we pondered safety concerns and time allocation when work and school came into our homes. Faced with too many options, we can become anxious or even paralyzed. This is “decision fatigue” -- a state of mental overload that can impede our ability to make additional choices. 
 
When decision fatigue kicks in, you may feel you just don’t have the bandwidth to deal with more decisions. This can lead to depleted self-control, causing you to avoid making certain choices entirely, to go with the default option, or to make choices that don’t align with your values.
 
In a series of experiments, researchers asked people to choose from an array of consumer goods or college course options or to simply think about the same options without making choices. The choice-makers experienced reduced self-control, less physical stamina, greater procrastination and lower performance on tasks; the choice-contemplators didn’t experience these depletions.
 
We can't entirely eliminate decision fatigue, but experts say the following can help cope with an over-abundance of choices:

• Sleep on it:  Decision fatigue builds up during the day. Sleep restores energy.
• Make some choices automatic:  For example, keep a master grocery list, and choose a consistent time to exercise or meditate.
• Enlist an advisor: Ask someone you trust to check your thinking.
• Check Your Expectations:  If you're buying a new TV or phone do you need the top model, or just one that’s workable.
• Pace Yourself:  Try not to make one decision after another. If you’ve had a demanding day filled with lots of decisions, put off making another one, if you can.

 
How do you cope with the feeling of having too many choices? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

Social skills correlate with career success, and lacking them can hold you back. The good news, according to Fast Company columnist Judith Humphrey, founder of the Humphrey Group leadership communication firm, is that you certainly can improve your interpersonal skill set, once you know what to focus on.
 
Here are her five concrete indicators that someone is socially adept:
​

1. They show appreciation for others:  Complimenting will not make you feel seem like a suck-up. To the person being complimented it will “sound like the absolute truth.”
2. They listen deeply:  True listening is harder than you think. It helps to make eye contact, have the intent to genuinely understand, and try to sense if there is something being left unsaid.
3. They’re enthusiastic:  Upbeat, positive people give us energy to draw upon. Blamers and complainers do the opposite.
4. They use body language effectively: Social skills transcend words. Consider your facial expression and tone of voice. Align your body posture with that of the person you’re talking with.
5. They’re grateful: Saying “thank you” goes a long way, so never miss an opportunity to do so!

 
How do you ascertain whether or not a colleague is socially skilled?  To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

Hybrid work is here to stay, and leaders will face challenges as they manage a workforce that is part in-person and part remote. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, management consultants Kalle Heikkinen, William Kerr, Mika Malin, and Panu Routila, offer advice based on interviews with 38 executives in Nordic countries. (Nordic leadership teams are used to operating in complex settings with employees spanning multiple nationalities, languages, and locations.)

1. The virtual world does not treat roles and tasks equally:  Some executives and middle managers are frustrated with their level of effectiveness when they work virtually. They may need increased training and mentoring. Additionally, leaders should be aware of who does, or doesn't, have access to the best technology, and avoid judging talent until they know that employees are not being hampered by sub-par tech.
2. Nuances matter in people management:  When in-person connections are less frequent, people skills become more important than ever. “The best leaders listen and show empathy, allocate more time to team management and coaching, enable versus control, and invest more in building a culture that reaches out of the office and into people’s homes.”
3. Strong central guidance is a must:  Many executives said that, in a hybrid setting, their organizations are becoming flatter and less hierarchical. Most have sought to boost the empowerment of employees, who need to make more and quicker connections across geographies and business units.
4. Ensure Your Processes are Crisis-Proof:  The pandemic showed how quickly many organizations can change and adapt. But this is hardly likely to be the last crisis of our turbulent times. The hybrid model will allow for more flexibility and resilience going forward, but it is also necessary to carry out important organizational changes before an emergency confronts us again.

 
What do you view as the biggest obstacle to seamless hybrid working, and what will you do to address it? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

As Valentine’s Day approaches, consider giving your loved ones these gifts—each with more staying power than flowers, cards, or chocolates:  

1. ​Listen when your impulse is to argue. Listening, a rare and pure gift from the heart, requires us to be quiet long enough to ponder our partner’s message.
2. Edit accusations that could make your partner feel put down and judged. Instead, describe your feelings. “I feel lonely” has a different ring than, “You’re selfish and unresponsive.”
3. Acknowledge your role in a problem. Every issue has another side. When we describe how we contributed, even unintentionally, to a problem, we encourage our partner to hear us out. For example, you might say: “When I asked how long your mother was going to stay with us and we got into a tiff, I could have clarified that I enjoy your mother’s company and was asking out of curiosity and not judgment.”
4. Agree on a solution. Reach an explicit, collaborative agreement about what each of you will do differently in the future.
5. Follow up on your agreements. Many attempts at resolving conflict end in failure but following up proves your commitment to view conflict resolution as a process rather than a one-shot deal.

As marriage and business partners for over 40 years, we can attest that while confronting issues is never easy, avoidance is worse. And we still endorse chocolate too: It’s good for your heart!
We want to hear: What communication behaviors would you like to change in your relationships this year, and what steps are you taking to do so? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

New Years resolutions, if not exactly “made to be broken,” don't have great staying power. Seventy–five percent of “resolvers” keep their resolutions after one week, 64 percent after a month, and merely 8 percent twelve months later.

But the reasons go beyond lack of will power. According to Elizabeth Grace Saunders, time management coach and author of How To Invest Your Time Like Money, many people fail to accomplish new goals because they don’t consciously eliminate old activities from their schedule to make room for the new. It’s like “trying to stuff more papers into a file drawer that’s already packed tight.” 

If your resolutions involve workplace goals and behaviors, consider the following:

• Question all of your work commitments.  The start of a new year marks the perfect time to reevaluate what you’re doing, and why.
• Reassess your work style. Now assess how you accomplish work. Do you really need all those meetings? Can you interact less with messaging technology?
• Add new goals strategically. Once you intentionally create space, you can strategically add in the activities that you want in your life. To say “yes” to the new, you must say “no” to some of the old.
  ​

What do you plan to resolve for this coming year, and how will you make room for it to happen? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

Welcome to our Community of Practice Forum, a forum dedicated to highlighting people and organizations around the world who have created best practices by applying our core communication tools and models to real life, real time situations.

The purpose of this forum is to serve as an incubator for ideas, where people share and learn from each other’s experiences.  It is a place to inspire others and also be acknowledged for your cutting edge communication practices.
  Our goal is to create a community of people practicing together; a powerful support network with the purpose of helping each other to transform engrained communication habits into sustained, positive outcomes.

So please share any applications – big or small – that have worked for you.  We look forward to joining the conversation.