 When it comes to staying healthy, science shows that social connection is as important as diet and exercise…
The Harvard Study of Adult Development has been minutely tracking the lives of some 724 original participants (and some of their descendants) since 1938. One of its biggest takeaways is that the greatest predictor of health and happiness isn’t a factor like cholesterol levels or blood pressure. It is the strength of a person’s social ties. But social fitness, one of the study’s directors said, is just like physical fitness: You must work at it. Harvard-trained social scientist and author Kasey Killam has a framework for doing so, calling it the 5-3-1 rule. At a minimum:
Of course, these research-based guidelines can be flexed, depending on circumstances like age, lifestyle, and physical limitations. However, the 5-3-1 rule makes for a great baseline. Offering some helpful tips to get started, Killam suggests putting some friendships on auto-pilot with a weekly or monthly dinner, walk, or other activity. You can also put a post-it on your bathroom mirror reminding you to reach out to someone. You can volunteer in your community, or commit to a set number of 10-minute phone calls each week. These strategies can help you create new habits that, in time, will become self-reinforcing. Are you getting your 5-3-1 in, and, if not, how can you create a new habit to do so? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.
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 It’s hard when someone you care about is upset, but asking them one simple question can help...
We can feel helpless when someone we care about is emotionally overwhelmed, and the last thing we want to do is say the wrong thing. Writing in the New York Times, Janee Dunn recounts the advice she got from a special education teacher. When one of her students is upset, she asks them: "Do you want to be helped, heard, or hugged?" Writes Dunn:, “It struck me that this question could be just as effective for adults.” Everyone handles emotions in their own way. And each option — thoughtful advice, empathetic listening, or a hug — has the power to comfort and soothe. A hug can release oxytocin, a bonding hormone that tamps down stress. Likewise, being heard with high quality listening has been shown to reduce defensiveness. Also, some research suggests that couples who give each other supportive advice create higher relationship satisfaction. Different emotions lead to upset and each may necessitate a different response. For example, someone experiencing anxiety may appreciate reassurance, but someone who is frustrated may rather be heard. And don’t try to problem-solve unless that kind of intervention is requested. Someone who is upset may already be aware of solutions, but they may want to process their experience before moving on. What do you most often need when you are upset, and how do you communicate that? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Trapped in continual “doing mode?” You’re not alone. Here’s how to give yourself permission to pause… and think bigger.
So many of us are focused on doing mode — achieving goals and checking items off to-do lists. But better relationships, bigger-picture strategies, and creative thinking all depend on pausing and entering into spacious mode. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Megan Reitz of Oxford University’s Said Business School, and John Higgins, director of research at The Right Conversation, share their research-based tips for making it easier and safer to occasionally switch modes.
When was the last time you deliberately took a pause to create thinking time, and what were the results? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. We'd really like to hear from you. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Setbacks are unavoidable. But these 5 steps can help you bounce back…
We have all faced it: We miss out on a promotion or a job offer, face harsh criticism, or fail to reach an important goal. Rebuilding your confidence after a setback is possible, but resilience requires reflection, patience, and proactive steps. Writing in Forbes, senior contributor Benjamin Laker offers this advice:
What have you done to recover from a setback in your professional life? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Friendships are so important, they can literally impact life and death…
Romance gets a lot of attention but, according to a growing body of research, friendships are critical to our health and well being. A review of 38 studies found that adult friendships, especially high-quality ones that provide social support and companionship, significantly predict wellness and can protect against mental health issues like anxiety and depression. Those benefits persist across the life span. Friendships protect to some degree by altering the way we respond to stress. Our blood pressure can lower when we talk to a supportive friend. When we have a friend by our side while completing a tough task, we have less heart rate reactivity than those working alone. Friendships can also change our perspective. In one study, people even judged a hill to be less steep when accompanied by a friend. Fortunately, research also suggests that friendships can be forged and maintained at any age. Even minimal social interactions can be powerful. So-called “weak ties” -- interactions we have with casual acquaintances -- can boost our health and sustain positivity. Isolation during the pandemic proved hard on nearly everyone, but it did focus scientific attention on how important human connection is across all ages and all spheres of life. Do you have friendships that nourish you, and do you actively make an effort to keep them going? Let us know if you’ve found a way to start new friendships as an adult. To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Communication is the lifeblood of leadership. So why are millions of employees exasperated and thwarted because of unclear communication from their boss?...
As more employees are working remotely or in hybrid work environments, the need for successful communication has never been greater. Yet, according to a recent report by FlexOS, employees gave their managers a mediocre 7 out of 10 — basically, a C — on managing hybrid and remote teams. Worse, 30 percent said they’re blocked and discouraged by unclear communication from their bosses. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Gleb Tsipursky, CEO of the consultancy Disaster Avoidance Experts and author of seven bestselling books, says, “As a manager, it’s your job to make sure vital information is shared appropriately and clearly, leaving no room for misunderstandings…” His advice:
Is your manager organized and thorough in their communication? What might they improve? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below.  New Years resolutions have terrible staying power. Here are 3 steps to be more successful this year…
According to Forbes, merely 8 percent of people keep their resolutions twelve months later. (You may have already noticed this happening, just 2 weeks into 2025.) The reasons for broken resolutions go beyond lack of will power. According to Elizabeth Grace Saunders, time management coach and author of How To Invest Your Time Like Money, many people fail to accomplish new goals because they don’t consciously eliminate old activities from their schedule to make room for the new. It’s like “trying to stuff more papers into a file drawer that’s already packed tight.” If your resolutions involve workplace goals and behaviors, consider the following:
What can you un- resolve for this coming year to make room for new priorities? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning programs.  Has your son or daughter become more monosyllabic as the teenage years set in, and far more interested in their phone than you? Good news: You can still break through with these 4 actions.
As Cara Natterson, a Los Angeles pediatrician and co-author of This Is So Awkward: Modern Puberty Explained told The New York Times, there are various ways to break through to teens:
When is the last time you had a good talk with your teenaged child, and how did you manage it? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. We hope this blog can be helpful to you over the holidays! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  If your job interview felt more like a dud than a win, don’t panic until you try these 4 moves…
Writing in Forbes, contributor Caroline Ceniza-Levine notes there are important criteria in deciding who moves on to callback interviews and the ultimate job offer. These include specific accomplishments that match the job description, your fit into the company culture, and your ideas about what you would bring to the role. Meanwhile, here’s what you can do while you wait:
Did you ever feel pessimistic after an interview only to get the job after all? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. Gratitude has consistently been shown to lower stress, reduce pain, boost immunity, and improve blood pressure and heart function. Here’s how to spread gratitude not just on Thanksgiving…but always.
We recently released a micro learning video series on how to express gratitude so it sticks, and these tools are easy to learn. Neuroscientist Glen Fox has spent his entire adult life studying gratitude. “Grateful people tend to recover faster from trauma and injury, have better and closer personal relationships and may even just have improved health overall.” Fox did an experiment using brain-imaging scans to map which circuits in the brain become active when we feel grateful. “We saw that the participants’ ratings of gratitude correlated with activity in a set of brain regions associated with interpersonal bonding and with relief from stress,” he said. To up your conscious gratitude, Fox suggests keeping a gratitude journal. On a regular basis, write down what you are grateful for, even if those things seem mundane. The positive effect is cumulative so it’s a good idea to make this a habit. You can also write letters of gratitude to those who have helped you along your way. Says Fox, “I think that gratitude can be much more like a muscle, like a trained response or a skill that we can develop over time.” When was the last time you actively expressed gratitude, and how did you feel? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Create lifetime communication mastery online, with our virtual programs, awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  To get what you want, try saying nothing, or in the words of our book title, Be Quiet, Be Heard…
“A well-deployed silence can radiate confidence and connection. The trouble is, so many of us are awful at it.” So writes Rachel Feintzeig in the Wall Street Journal, and we couldn't agree more. Most of us rush in to fill any void in a conversation, but remaining still can reap untold benefits. Strategic silence can help in negotiations and selling. Instead of countering every point, try embracing a pause and soon you may find your counterpart jumping in with valuable information that will help you understand their needs and close. Sometimes holding your tongue can feel like going against biology. Humans are social animals, says Robert N. Kraft, professor emeritus of cognitive psychology at Ohio’s Otterbein University. “Our method of connecting — and we crave it — is talking.” For years, Kraft assigned his students a day without words, and many students also found that when forced to stop talking, they bonded better with their peers. Without pauses, we’re generally worse speakers, going off on tangents, stumbling over sounds, offering TMI (too much information), and maybe saying things we later regret. We can also put undue stress on ourselves, as talking to excess can raise our blood pressure, adrenaline and cortisol. So, the next time you are unsure of what to say, try saying nothing at all. Can you recall an instance when staying quiet helped you get what you wanted? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  From casual interactions to formal presentations, there is one, simple, 3-step hack to help you get through to people when it matters most.
Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Matt Abrahams, who teaches organizational behavior at Stanford Graduate School of Business, offers a simple hack to achieve this... Structure your message to cover "What?", "So what?", and "Now what?"
This framework is applicable to a vast number of situations. As Abrahams says, it organizes your thoughts, serves as a guidepost to those you are trying to influence, and renders information easy to follow and act on. It is equally useful in presentations, answering questions, and providing feedback. This structure supports your message, so that it is heard, internalized, and acted upon. Does this structure look like something you can use? We’d love to hear your results! To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  If your out-of-office email reply suggests that you will get back to everyone…as soon as you return…it may be time to make a big change.
The number of emails sent daily has increased 34 percent since 2017. When you are on PTO, you might welcome relief from all these messages. But does your Out of Office reply make promises you shouldn’t have to keep—like, “I will get back to you as soon as I return”? Making good on this pledge might require superhuman powers, not to mention being a waste of your valuable post vacation time. Writing in the Wall Street Journal, reporter Elizabeth Bernstein found some great examples of a more creative approach:
If these replies serve their purpose, your time off may actually be your time. And returning to work, won’t be an exhausting struggle. What does your Out of Office Reply say, and do you feel inclined to change it? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Workplace bullying is real…and painful, too often leading to stress, burnout, and worse. Here are 5 actions to stop it.
Research from the Workplace Bullying Institute indicates that 30 percent of employees experience workplace bullying at some point, and of those targeted, 67% are at risk of losing their job. Bullying goes beyond incivility, writes Professor Jason Walker, a contributor to Forbes. “It is calculated and deliberately aimed at causing harm.” Its targets are often highly valued, competent employees who prefer to avoid conflict. So, what can you do if you are a target? Walker advises the following actions. 5 Actions To Stop Workplace Bullying:
Have you experienced workplace bullying and how did you cope? To join the conversation, click on "comments" on below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  At the heart of gossip is someone else’s pain. Here are 4 actions to take if that someone is you… Once a rumor takes hold in the workplace, it is hard to stop. Writing in Inc., Mary Wright, of California Employment Law Advice and Counsel, enumerates steps to take if you are the brunt of office gossip. 4 Actions To Take If You're The Subject of Gossip
Contrary to popular belief, most people feel guilty (some less than others) about spreading false or harmful stories about colleagues. Confrontation will usually get those people to stop talking – at least stop talking about you. Have you ever been the subject of hurtful gossip, and how did you deal with it? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. |
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