Why Small Talk Matters and How to Do It

Small talk is how we open conversations with strangers, build rapport, and plant the seeds for deeper relationships — but how do you actually do it? 

Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Melissa Hahn, a professor at American University’s School of International Service and Andy Molinsky, a Brandeis University
professor and author of Global Dexterity, offer tips for upping your small talk game:

• Use communities and your environment: If you’re attending a conference, that is something you have in common with all the attendees. You can ask: Have you been to this conference before? What keeps bringing you back? Do you have any favorite cafes in this city?
• Ask open-ended questions: Small differences in how we phrase questions can have a big impact on the way conversations develop. A close-ended query would be, “Do you like the conference so far?” An open-ended one would be, “What do you think of the conference? Any highlights so far?” The latter does not lend itself to yes or no answers.
• Share something about yourself: When you share something about yourself (personal but not too private) the other person feels like they are getting to know you. For example, did you leave a pet at home? Are you a parent? Are you looking for a good running route? Soon you may find common ground.
• Explore various angles of a topic: If the conversation veers to a topic you don’t know much about, try to find an adjacent topic, or ask questions to learn more.
• Just say “Hello”: If you are unsure about navigating small talk, just introduce yourself! That is often enough of an icebreaker.

Do you have a go-to method of initiating small talk? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.  We would love to get your feedback!

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