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Are You Coaching or Telling?

6/27/2023

Many leaders think they are successful at coaching, but in reality lots of them are simply telling their employees what to do. Writing in The Harvard Business Review leadership researchers and consultants Julia and Trenton Milner point out that actual coaching unlocks an individual’s potential. Recently the authors undertook a study that showed how rare master coaching really is. But the good news, they say, is that most mangers can learn to be good coaches in a relatively short period of time.

When first asked to coach, most managers tend to give advice or offer a solution. But this is actually more micromanaging than coaching. Happily, they become better coaches quickly by employing these skills:

Listening
Asking Questions
Giving Feedback
Clarifying Goals
Showing Empathy
Identifying Strengths
Providing Structure
Facilitating Coach-driven Solutions

In the ongoing study, the skills managers struggled with the most were identifying strengths as well as letting coaches arrive at their own solutions. Clearly, Coach Training must address these skills by changing mindsets and offering a safe space in which to practice and discuss personal challenges.

What do you find is your biggest personal challenge when it comes to coaching? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above.

Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.

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Warren Buffet’s Big Success Tip

6/20/2023

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People often look to Warren Buffet for investment tips. So we took note when Buffet claimed that often the best investment you can make is in your ability to communicate. Buffett has stated that investing in developing your communication skills can "improve your value by 50 percent."

Buffett says, "If you can't communicate…nothing happens. You can have all the brainpower in the world, but you have to be able to transmit it. And the transmission is communication."
Writing in Inc., contributing editor Marcel Schwantes offers these tips for heeding Buffet’s words:

Tell stories, especially inspiring ones: Storytelling is as old as humanity. It engages listeners like no other kind of content and it builds trust. Notice that super-successful entrepreneurs like Steve Jobs and Richard Branson were master storytellers.
Use analogies and metaphors: Is something new and unfamiliar like something more well known and understood? Point out the similarities so people can feel comfortable with even bold, breakthrough ideas. Metaphors and analogies provide clarity.
Know how to confront someone: It is natural to want to avoid confrontation, but the reality is that engaging in challenging conversations is often the quickest route to solving problems and deepening trust. Calmly stating your case without judging can cut though a lot of communication clutter.

Do you agree that improving your communication skills has upped your personal value? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above.

Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.

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Interactive Listening

6/13/2023

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Do you think you’re a good listener? Most of us probably rate ourselves as “above average” in this area (a mathematical impossibility). Most people think effective listening consists of not interrupting, letting others know you are listening (uh-huh, mmm-hmm) and being able to repeat back what others have said.

However, new research, conducted by Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman of the Zenger/Folkman Leadership Development Group, suggests that these behaviors fall far short of describing good listening skills.

Their four main findings:

Good listeners are not always silent when others talk. They periodically ask questions that prompt discovery and insight. Good listening is more of a two-way dialogue than speaker vs. listener.
Good listening builds the speaker’s self-esteem. Good listeners make the other person feel supported and convey confidence. Good listening creates a safe environment so issues and differences can be discussed openly.
Good listening is a cooperative conversation. Good listeners may challenge assumptions and disagree, “but the person being listened to feels the listener is trying to help, not wanting to win an argument.”
Good listeners tend to make suggestions. Good listening invariably includes some feedback in an acceptable format that opens up alternative paths to consider.

Not every conversation requires the highest levels of listening, but many conversations would benefit from greater focus and from the intention to listen interactively.

When you are a listener, do you engage in these practices, and when you are a speaker, would you appreciate them? To join the conversation, click "comments" on above.
Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning programs.

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Up Your EQ With These Five Words

6/6/2023

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“There are very simple things you can change about your behavior -- as simple as memorizing a few basic words and concepts -- to leverage emotions and increase the odds that you'll achieve your goals.” So writes Bill Murphy Jr., contributing editor of Inc.. Murphy contends that people with high emotional intelligence keep five simple words in mind when they hope to be persuasive.

Prefacing: Signal to your listeners that you’d like them to pay attention by saying something like, “There’s something I'd like you to consider,” or “Would you mind if I gave you a piece of advice?”
Prioritizing: Organize your arguments, keep them short, and present your points in groups of three (we seem hardwired to think of things in triads).
Pausing: Use pauses as a tool to elicit desired responses. Want to offer relief and comfort? Pause two seconds in your discussion.
Politeness: Leverage politeness as a means of lessening resistance to your message.
Phrasing: Emotionally intelligent people tend toward specific phrases that they've thought through so that they don't accidentally trigger unintended emotions. For example, they might ask, “Can you help me think this through and understand your position better?"

Which of these words resonate most with you, and why? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.

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Are You Coaching or Telling?

Warren Buffet’s Big Success Tip

Interactive Listening

Up Your EQ With These Five Words

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