 Research suggests that asking questions that show you're listening is a great way to make conversations click. Since not all questions are equal, here are 3 tips.
Conversations help us forge and deepen connections. And they are essential to our well being. Sometimes, though, we avoid conversations because we fear they may become tedious, awkward, or even confrontational. Writing in the Journal of the American Psychological Association, Zara Abrams notes that one of the best ways to make conversations click is to ask questions. But be conscious of how you do this:
Do you have a go-to conversational style that works for you? And what do you do to show you're listening? To join the conversation, click "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.
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 Do you find unplanned phone calls delightful surprises or bothersome intrusions? Is it fine to call someone spontaneously, or is it impolite to call without texting first? Phone call etiquette has never been more complicated, and it is dividing friends, families and co-workers!
According to The Wall Street Journal, the debate is raging. The more entrenched texting becomes, the more people find a phone call without warning, unacceptable. Yet others find the phone-call-phobic to be rigid and even ridiculous, claiming that phone calls are never “unannounced” — the ringing is the announcement, aided by caller ID. Although exceptions exist, attitudes toward phone calls tend to cluster generationally. Those who grew up with landlines tend to see no problems with spontaneous calls. But those who have been texting since high school, or earlier, feel differently. Preference for text messaging is highest among those 18 to 24, followed by those 25 to 34, according to a December survey from YouGov. Among 2,000 white-collar professionals surveyed by recruiting firm Robert Walters in March, a mere 16% of those who are Gen Z (born between 1997-2012) thought the phone was a productive form of professional communication. They use Zoom, Slack, email or text with ease, but they’re far less likely to make or answer a phone call. So, what should you do? If you have the urge to call, consider factors such as the relationship you have with the person and whether they have expressed a preference about how to communicate. And you might want to react differently to an unannounced phone call from a salesperson than a relative. Do you prefer to be texted before someone calls you, and do you do the same for others? To join the conversation, click "comments" below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  At work, comparisons are everywhere: Jealousy of a colleague’s successes, or work schedule, or relationships with leadership. But what if your boss is jealous of you?
Writing in The Harvard Business Review, Ruchi Sinha, PhD, Associate Professor of Organizational Behavior at the University of South Australia, says, “You may need to manage their emotions to manage your career.” Here are 4 ways to manage your boss's emotions:
Have you experienced a jealous manager, and how did you handle them? To join the conversation, click on "comments" below. We would really like to hear about your experiences! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Have you ever said "yes" because you were afraid of being seen as uncooperative, of hurting people’s feelings, of getting others into trouble with their bosses, of missing opportunities?
Saying "yes" when you mean "no" robs you of an irreplaceable resource: your time. Refusing someone’s request is easier than you think. And, it gives you the space to agree when something is important to you. Writer Leslie Jamison used to be afraid to say no. Ultimately, she kept a notebook of all the things to which she automatically said “uh-uh”…and she learned 4 important lessons:
When was the last time you said “no”, and were you glad you did? To join the conversation, click "comments" on below. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Kudos to leaders who practice vulnerability and make an effort to connect with their team. Here are 5 tips so that sharing does not become oversharing and make people uncomfortable.
It is best to remain “selectively vulnerable”… opening up while still respecting the emotional boundaries of your team. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Liz Fosslien and Mollie West Duffy, co-authors of No Hard Feelings, offer advice on how to do that:
What methods do you use to reign in extreme emotions at work? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above -- we'd love to hear about your experiences! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Being seen and recognized for your work can usher in new opportunities and move your career to the next level. So how do you become more visible?
According to Melody Wilding, executive coach and author of Trust Yourself, even introverts can find ways to play to their strengths and boost visibility.
What have you done to become more visible at your job, and what were the results? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above. We would love to hear about your experiences! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Small talk is how we open conversations with strangers, build rapport, and plant the seeds for deeper relationships — but how do you actually do it?
Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Melissa Hahn, a professor at American University’s School of International Service and Andy Molinsky, a Brandeis University professor and author of Global Dexterity, offer tips for upping your small talk game:
Do you have a go-to method of initiating small talk? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. We would love to get your feedback! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  It’s possible to fake emotional intelligence – like forgeries and knock-offs. But there are 3 ways to spot counterfeit EQ, not just in others but also in yourself.
Interacting from a place of emotional intelligence requires empathy, active listening, and self-awareness. But some leaders can counterfeit these emotions so skillfully that they can even fool themselves. Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Ron Carucci, managing partner at Navalent and author of To Be Honest, says, “Our ability to express emotional intelligence is sometimes impaired by unacknowledged, unhealthy, emotional needs." If you want to genuinely communicate emotional intelligence, pay attention to these 3 common imitations:
How would you rate your EQ, as well as the leaders you work with most closely? Are there ways to become even more authentic? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Sometimes you just need one word to change someone’s mind.
Jonah Berger, Professor of Marketing at the University of Pennsylvania Wharton School, compiled a list of “magic words” that can change the way you communicate. He discovered that using the word “because” while trying to convince someone to do something has a compelling result. He found that more people “will listen to you and do what you want” when you offer a justification for your requests. Berger points to a classic study from Harvard University where researchers sat in a university library and waited for someone to use the copy machine. Then, they walked up and asked to cut in front of the unknowing participant. They phrased their request in three different ways:
Both requests using “because” made the people already making copies more than 50 percent more likely to comply. Interestingly, even the second phrasing — which could be reinterpreted as “May I step in front of you to do the same exact thing you’re doing?” — was effective. The phrasing indicated that the stranger asking for a favor was at least being considerate about it, the study suggested. “Persuasion wasn’t driven by the reason itself,” Berger notes, “It was driven by the power of the word: because.” Have you noticed any reactions when you justify requests with “because”? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. We would love hear about your experience with this one, magic word! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  What’s the secret to solving unexpected challenges, seizing new opportunities, and building strong cultures? Ask powerful questions!
Leaders who assume they have all the answers are either clueless or lying. So writes John Hagel III, in the Harvard Business Review). He describes how leaders who know how to ask great questions build a reservoir of trust and team performance. Here are some effective research-based tips:
Check out our Collaborative Problem Solving Model as a vehicle for bringing teams together to solve meaningful, creative questions central to the team’s work. What is the last big question you asked your team? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above -- we would love to hear about your experiences! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  While disagreeing may be uncomfortable, research tells us that diverse thinking is far more likely to lead to progress, innovations and breakthroughs than “nice” conversations where people hide what they really think.
But how do you foster productive debate on your team? Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Shane Snow, author of Dream Teams: Working Together Without Falling Apart, offers four tips:
How do you keep a debate on track when it seems to be veering? To join the conversation, click "comments" above -- we'd love to hear from you! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Ever been in a situation where you’re getting resistance to your opinion? Try switching from “you” to “we”.
New research from Stanford University reveals how using “you” versus “we” affects how people respond to messages in settings such as online forums and a simulated workplace scenario. Their findings are notable: In adversarial contexts that held the potential for disagreement or conflict, messages that used “you” and “your” were less persuasive, less likely to be shared, and more likely to be censored than ones that employed “we” and “our.” People who participated in the study were also less inclined to interact or engage with the sources of messages that used “you” rather than “we.” “We’re not saying that ‘you’ invariably leads to worse outcomes,” study co-author Mohamed Hussein cautions. “We’re saying that when ‘you’ is used in an adversarial or conflict-ridden context, it has the potential to inadvertently lead to negative consequences.” “We” is more inclusive and lands less aggressively. “Most people would rather talk to a person who says ‘we got this wrong’ than ‘you got this wrong',” says the study’s other co-author, Zakary Tormala. Tormala and Hussein advise that if you’re trying to reach someone with an opposing view, be sure to signal that you are open to their perspective. Managing your pronouns is just one way to do that. What results occur when you change “you” messages to “we” messages? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above -- we'd love to hear from you! Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Tired of people finishing your sentences or cutting your stories or opinions short to interject their own? What can you do about annoying interruptions?
For many of us, being interrupted can feel diminishing and condescending, says Maria Venetis, an associate professor of Communication at Rutgers University. Sometimes it’s even “enraging,” she added, “because it suggests that my ideas or my participation aren’t valid.” Interrupters often have, or believe they have, more power, and they’re used to having people defer when they talk. Jancee Dunn, of The New York Times, studied how to handle interruptions at work and in relationships, and offers these suggestions. At work:
In personal relationships:
Who interrupts you the most and how have you tried to correct it? To join the conversation, click "comments" above -- we'd love to hear from you! To find out how to create a habit around masterful communication, signup for our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Are your ideas resonating, or being ignored? Perhaps it’s not the ideas themselves but their delivery.
Writing in the Harvard Business Review, Anne Sugar, executive coach for the Harvard Business School Executive Program, offers four strategies you can use to help ensure your ideas resonate.
Have you ever been frustrated with your ideas going unheeded, and what did you do? To join the conversation, click on "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022.  Have you been phubbed lately? “Phubbing" — a mix of “phone” and “snubbing”— is when someone pays more attention to their smartphone than they do to the people with whom they are face to face.
Not surprisingly, research has shown that phubbing has a negative impact on relationship satisfaction and can lead to increased conflict. This is especially true with married couples. The good news is that researchers have also determined that effective communication skills can mitigate the impact of phubbing. Those skills include:
We cannot turn back the clock on technology, but phubbing should be seen as a problem. Addressing it by prioritizing face-to-face time and spending that time engaged in positive communication can help contain the potential damage. Have you been phubbed lately? How did it make you feel, and what did you do? To join the conversation, click "comments" above. Learn more about creating a habit around masterful communication with our online learning courses awarded International Gold for Best Hybrid Learning of 2022. |
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