Everyone uses filler words, like “um” and “ah”—from Kim Kardashian to Barack Obama. When we are speaking spontaneously, we probably use them every five seconds. Filler words “appear in every language and every culture,” says Steven D. Cohen an assistant professor of Communication at the University of Baltimore. And although they have a “bad reputation” recent research suggests they may have benefits--aiding listener recall and comprehension. Filler words in moderation can be a tool for persuasion and influence. The secret is knowing which words to use, managing frequency, and consciously choosing where they occur in a sentence. Cohen adds that any type of filler words used mid-sentence, are less noticeable than those used at the beginning or end. To eliminate the use of filler words at the start or end of a thought, or to cut down on their use significantly, Cohen recommends recruiting listeners to clap when you use a filler word so you can get into the habit of omitting them. His most salient tip, however, is replacing filler words with a pause. “A simple pause can have a dramatic impact on our filler word use and how other people perceive us.” We want to hear: Do you notice when others use filler words? Do you mind? Do you feel you use them too much, and if so how have you tried to reduce this? To join the conversation, click "comments" below. If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion
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With so much noise out there, how can your message be heard? In her new book, Impossible to Ignore: Creating Memorable Content to Influence Decisions, cognitive scientist Carmen Simon, PhD, says it is crucial to craft messages according to how the human brain works. “Most people worry about not remembering the past,” says Simon ”In business, what we should be worried about is whether our audiences remember us in the future…where decisions happen.” When we attempt to influence people, our audiences are likely to make decisions about our messages at a future point. This point can be minutes, weeks, or months later. The key ingredient to business success is people remembering us in the future, and making a decision in our favor. Simon notes that memory works via associations. The stronger the associations we enable, the more likely someone will take the action we want them to take. Her advice: Be clear what it is you want your audience to remember and implant cues (verbal, visual, audio) that will stick. Memorable phrases (“Get curious, not furious”) and content that makes people smile are two winners. We want to hear: What techniques do you use to get people to remember the essence of your message? What are some cues that you remembered and that caused you to take action? To join the conversation, click "comments" below on our Community of Practice Forum. If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion. We’ve heard a lot lately about the power of stories, and about how the content of a good story stays with listeners more than any other type of information (e.g. facts, statistics, or even analogies). Now scientists are beginning to understand why. According to a recent New York Times article, scientists recently mapped the experience of listening to podcasts, (specifically NPR’s “The Moth Radio Hour”) using a scanner to track brain activity. They laid out a detailed map of the brain as it absorbed and responded to each story: “Widely dispersed sensory, emotional and memory networks were humming, across both hemispheres of the brain; no story was ‘contained’ in any one part of the brain, as some textbooks have suggested.” The researchers broke the stories into units of meaning—e.g. social elements, locations and emotions—and found that these concepts fell into 12 categories that tended to cause activation in the same parts of people’s brains at the same points throughout the stories. They then retested that model by seeing how it predicted M.R.I. activity while the volunteers listened to another Moth story. The “kaleidoscope of activation” explains why any of us can get so utterly entranced by a good tale that time flies as we listen to it—yet we remember it long after. We want to hear: Have you ever felt completely engrossed when listening to a good story? Do you use stories in your business life, and do you have a favorite you’d like to share? To join the conversation, click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum. If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion We have written earlier about how effective storytelling is in business. Because stories engage our emotions, they are, as numerous studies have shown, the most memorable kind of content—far more so than cold, hard data. We typically hear examples of stories used in marketing, branding, or public relations. But storytelling can also help us imagine the future and help guide teams through long-term changes. Writing in Fast Company, Patti Sanchez, coauthor of Illuminate: Ignite Change Through Speeches, Stories, Ceremonies, and Symbols, says, “the most successful business leaders…don’t just see a new business strategy, organizational change, or product launch as an initiative to be executed. They see it as an epic journey, marked by moments of triumph as well as moments of defeat.” In other words, they present their organization’s challenge as a quest, using the classic mythic structure that has shaped the tales of heroic journeys: a call to adventure, rising to a series of tests, and emerging victorious with newfound wisdom. But Sanchez points out that it’s not enough for leaders to narrate a quest from solely their point of view. Her advice—with which we wholeheartedly agree: “Listen to your fellow travelers to understand how they’re experiencing the journey, and gather stories that are meaningful to them. Then, use that information to create a narrative so they’ll feel as motivated as you are to press onward. That way, it will be their story, too—though as a leader, it’s your responsibility to tell it. We want to hear: Does your organization have a “quest-like” story that you would like to share? To join the conversation, click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum. If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion. In October 2015, a robot took center stage at a Wall Street Journal Live event in Laguna Beach California. Pepper, one of the first robots with the ability to identify and respond to emotions, can discern the difference between happy and sad, responding with appropriate body language. Already “employed” by thousands of businesses in Japan, the amazing Pepper has a trick for differentiating between an encounter with a human versus, say, a piece of furniture. The difference is: humans smile. The “science of smiling” was first discussed by Charles Darwin, who pointed out that while many other nonverbal behaviors, like gestures, differ between cultures—and are probably learned—smiling is innate to human beings. Babies born blind smile like sighted infants, and all infants learn early that while their crying garners adult attention, smiling keeps it. The moral: if you want to engage the attention of people—or robots!—smile. Best of all, at least when it comes to people, smiling creates what psychologists call a “virtuous circle”. Smiling gets reciprocated and, in social groups, can be contagious. Certain businesses, like the service and entertainment industries, encourage employees to smile so that it becomes a natural part of their work activity. And we can all remind ourselves to smile more. It is a relatively easy habit to adopt, because it yields quick and immediate rewards. We want to hear. Do you notice how you respond differently to people who smile at you? Do you consciously try to smile more when you are trying to engage customers or others? To join the conversation, click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum. If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion. It’s hard to top email for convenience. According to new research, however, we all sound smarter when we communicate verbally. Findings of a recent study cited in The New York Times suggest that phone conversations or face-to-face interactions may be more effective when trying to impress a prospective employer or to close a deal. Vocal cues “show that we are alive inside — thoughtful, active…Text strips that out,” said Nicholas Epley, a professor of behavioral science at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business and one of two co-authors of the paper, “The Sound of Intellect,” recently published in Psychological Science. In an experiment presented in the paper, M.B.A. candidates were asked to prepare a pitch to a prospective employer — a two-minute proposal that the researchers recorded on video. Separately, the researchers recruited 162 people to evaluate these pitches. Some of the evaluators watched the video; a second group listened to the audio only; a third group read a transcript of the pitch. The evaluators who heard the pitch—via audio or video—rated the candidates’ intellect higher than those who read the transcript. In a second experiment, evaluators read a pitch specifically drafted by candidates to be read, rather than spoken. The result was the same. We are not surprised by the results of these experiments. Good writing is an excellent tool, but no writing can convey the nuances of the spoken word, which is embellished by tone and cadence and amplified by gestures and facial expressions. Remember this study the next time you ask yourself if you should press “send” or speak your piece. We want to hear! What criteria do you use to decide whether to write or speak what you have to say? Do you prefer it when others email you or speak with you directly? Join the conversation and click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum. In one way or another we all vie for attention—whether pitching an idea or trying to be recognized for the good work we do. In his new book, Captivology: The Science of Capturing People’s Attention, recently profiled in Business Insider, author and investor Ben Parr summarized research on top attention-getting triggers.
Among them:
We agree with Parr when he concludes that the greatest “masters of attention” create a sense of community with their audience. We have seen over and over again how establishing common ground with others and recognizing them for their accomplishments predisposes them to listen attentively and respectfully to what you have to say. We want to hear: How do you capture people’s attention and what do others do to capture yours? To join the conversation, click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum. We humans have told stories to one another since the dawn of language and civilization. Now business gurus are calling storytelling the most powerful strategic tool for anyone who wants to influence and persuade. We agree! But what draws people to a particular story? Keith Quesenberry, a lecturer at the Center for Leadership Education at Johns Hopkins, dissected two years’ worth of Super Bowl commercials using Freytag’s Pyramid, named after a German novelist who saw common patterns in the plots of novels: Act 1, scene setting; Act 2, rising action; Act 3, turning point; Act 4, falling action; Act 5, resolution/release. Quesenberry’s team coded Superbowl commercials for their number of acts and predicted the Budweiser commercial “Puppy Love” would win the ratings. It was the viewers’ top pick in a USA Today poll, and the beer’s sales rose. When stories don’t work, Linderman says, it’s because we judge, analyze and explain an experience, rather than tell it. In our Persuasion and Influence course we consistently emphasize that a great story includes characters – with their voices -- and a compelling plot. We want to hear. What has been your experience with stories – both as a teller and a listener? Join the conversation and click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum. Credit: Het Nieuwe Instituut The art of storytelling in business has been getting quite the buzz lately. For decades we have introduced this skill in our Persuasion and Influence course. But as storytelling consultant Shawn Callahan, who works with Global 1000 companies including Shell, IBM, and Microsoft, says, “We see lots of people talking about stories but very few telling them.” Callahan says understanding the simple framework of a story will help. How do you know if you’ve got a viable story? *A story begins with a time or place marker (when/where did it happen?). *It recounts an event, with feeling. *It includes dialogue (“And then he said…”). *It has a business point (the reason for telling the story is…). People pay attention when you tell a story – and stories are remembered. So mining your experience for stories is time well spent. We want to hear! Have you told or heard a good story recently? What was its impact? Join the conversation and click "comments" on our Community of Practice Forum. Image Credit: AZ https://www.flickr.com/photos/azrasta/ We recently wrote about Harvard professor Amy Cuddy’s research on “power poses” and how striking an expansive pose before a high stakes interview or presentation can boost confidence. (Stand with your limbs stretched out from your body, hold your head high, and it’s hard to feel insecure!) Now we’d like to take this concept a step further.
In a recent talk on body/mind alignment and its importance in conveying our messages, Stanford professor and social psychologist Deborah Gruenfeld cited research showing that in group settings (like meetings), those with high status assume more expansive body postures than those with lower status. On a subliminal level, people decide in microseconds who is—and isn’t—worth paying attention to. If you want your words to resonate, align them with your body posture. A few subtle changes can make all the difference. Moving your elbows away from your body or draping an arm across a chair can increase your perceived status, while contracting your limbs, bowing you head, or turning one foot inward can lower it. When verbal and non-verbal messages align, our impact is greater. Share your experience: Have you equated higher status with expansive body postures when you observe work colleagues? What happens when you try altering your own non-verbal body posture? Join the conversation and click "comments" below. Is stress always harmful? A long-term study of 30,000 individuals published in Health Psychology in 2012 revealed that people who reported experiencing high stress were 43% more likely to die prematurely, but this was only true if they believed stress adversely affected their health.
For decades, in our public speaking courses we have been teaching that stress is the motor of performance. So rather than dreading the stress of speech anxiety, we learn to embrace it as ‘the juice’ that energizes us. This new research suggests that this is also likely to be true in interpersonal communication—where avoiding conflict is often done to avoid stress! Begin to think positively when you feel your stress rising as an important communication event approaches. Think: "This is the feeling I need in order to perform at my maximum. I am ready…" This reframing may save your life. Please share your thoughts with us! What happened when you began to appreciate those sweaty palms and that rapid breathing that signals stress? Share your responses to the weekly discussion question on our forum: Community of Practice Forum |
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