Disagree More (Without Being Disagreeable)

Agreeing with someone is easier than confronting them, and it feels good to be “on the same page.” But conflict-free work environments are virtually non-existent. Disagreement is not only inevitable, but also a normal, healthy part of
relating to others.
Disagreements in the workplace have the potential to lead to better work
outcomes, opportunities to learn, higher job satisfaction, and even improved
relationships born of working through conflicts. Writing in the Harvard Business
Review, Amy Gallo, an HBR contributing editor and author of the HBR Guide to
Dealing with Conflict at Work, offers advice for those who are reluctant to
disagree:

• Let go of the need to be liked: Instead of focusing on likeability, focus on respect—both giving and receiving it.
• Focus on the big picture: Why is your point of view important to the needs of your organization? Thinking of this will purge selfish motives from your disagreement.
• Don't equate disagreeing with being unkind: Most people are open to hearing a different perspective if you share it thoughtfully and respectfully. Ask yourself: Is there really a risk that you will hurt your coworker’s feelings, or are you projecting your own discomfort?
• Find a role model and emulate them: Chances are you have a colleague, relative, or friend who does a fairly good job of being straightforward about their thoughts and opinions without ruffling feathers. Observe that person. Do what they do—even if you have to “fake it until you become it.”

Did you express your views the last time you disagreed with someone at
work—and what was the result? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

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