Giving Tough Feedback

It can be tough to give tough feedback. The challenge is to do so in a way that motivates change without making the other person feel defensive. There are several common pitfalls in offering negative feedback: using the opportunity to blow off steam instead of to coach, surrounding negative feedback with so much positive feedback that it goes unnoticed, or simply avoiding and delaying because we anticipate the employee will become argumentative.
 
Writing in the Harvard Business Review, management professor and executive coach Monique Valcour notes that powerful, high-impact feedback conversations share the following elements:
 

1. An intention to help the employee grow, rather than prove how wrong the person was. The feedback should increase, not diminish, the employee’s motivation and resources for change.
   
   
2. Openness on the part of the feedback giver, which is essential to creating a positive connection. “If you start off feeling uncomfortable and self-protective, your employee will match that energy, and you’ll each leave the conversation frustrated with the other person.”
   
   
3. Inviting the employee into the problem-solving process by asking questions such as: What ideas do you have? What will you take from this conversation? What are some possible next steps? What might I do to help?
   
   

A single conversation can switch an employee on — or shut them down. A true leader sees the raw material for success in every individual says Valcour and “creates the conditions to let it shine, even when the challenge is tough.”
 
What was your experience the last time you had to deliver tough feedback? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

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