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Picking Up Where a Friendship Left Off

11/6/2018

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Studies show that high-quality friendships provide positive health benefits, including lower incidences of chronic illnesses, higher levels of happiness and lower mortality rates (https://bit.ly/2PBqFle). Strong social support networks can also be a hedge against stress, depression and anxiety, say researchers (https://bit.ly/2PBqFle). Many of us are reflecting fondly on old friendships and wondering if they can be revived. (Tweet it!) In our electronic world, friends are often just a click, a text, or an email away—but what’s the best way to reach out, if at all?
 
Writing in The New York Times, Anna Goldfarb consulted with experts, who offered these tips:
 
  • Take Inventory – Ask yourself why the friendship ended (was it a falling out or just a fading away?) and what bonded you in the past.
  • Manage Expectations – Things change for everyone. Don't overwhelm a long-lost pal with prying questions. Let them disclose at their own comfort level.
  • State Your Purpose – Be honest about your reasons for reaching out.
  • Test the Waters – Start with small, low stakes gestures. Maybe congratulate them on a milestone. This can set the stage for more meaningful conversations.
  • Go Slow – Make sure you're on solid ground before introducing (or reintroducing) your spouse, kids or others of significance.
 
Finally, be prepared for all outcomes. It takes two to keep a relationship going, so the goal of renewal has to work for you both.

 
Have you ever reached out to an old friend? How did you initiate and what was the outcome? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

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