The Confidence to Say "No"
It can be hard to say no, both because we want to accommodate people and also because we are sometimes insecure about standing up for our own priorities. (Tweet it!) Consequently, we can end up taking on too much, and perhaps avoiding people we fear will ask us to do more.
But Chikodi Chima, a former VentureBeat staff reporter who helps startups with their public relations and marketing, contends that saying no is saying yes to freedom. “Having the confidence and foresight to say no makes you stand out. When you have clear goals, it’s easier to say no.” (https://bit.ly/2IiB6dX) Chima quotes Steve Jobs as an example of someone who used the power of “no” wisely. “I’m actually as proud of the things we haven’t done as the things we have done,” Jobs said at the 1997 Worldwide Developers Conference. “Innovation is saying no to 1,000 things.”
Sure, we want to be liked and we don't want to offend. But in the end, don’t we also want to do what we truly believe in? If so, then “no” is one of they keys to success, says Chima. “The more clear our goals become, the easier and more powerful each no becomes. Saying ‘no’ takes practice, and it may backfire, but to me it’s the ultimate sign of maturity.”
When was the last time you said no to someone else so you could pursue what mattered more to you? How did that experience turn out? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.
If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion
6/5/2018 09:27:42 am
After being bogged down by too many commitments because I didn't want tobe unhelpful, I realized I WAS being unhelpful in other parts of my life. I received a gift of a bracelet with the word YES engraved on it. On the inside of the bracelet were the words I CAN. Right then I heard myself say,"Yes, I can say no." What a difference. I'm doing a little less a little better.
6/18/2018 03:38:01 pm
Wow! "Yes I can...say no" is so true. Thanks for sharing that gem with us and our community Sally.
6/5/2018 09:41:40 am
As a recent graduate, I said no to a promising job with comfortable pay and great position. I took a risk in accepting another job with the curiosity of learning a new industry and following my gut. Daily I've been continuing to doubt if that was the right choice. Now I spend more time trying to prove my new employer I'm capable of doing more. It is even worst being young and a recent graduate because businesses are stuck thinking young people are inexperience, which certainly isn't true. What advice do you have to gain trust from your employer?
6/18/2018 03:36:46 pm
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