Want Successful Kids? Consider Changing Your Advice

Parents want their kids to be successful, but much of the advice we give them can be counterproductive (http://bit.ly/2uVGjOS) says Emma Seppala, Science Director of Stanford University’s Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education. Seppala discovered some useful suggestions in researching her book, The Happiness Track:
 

• Substitute “Live in the moment” for “Focus on the future”:  A mind focused on the future can be prone to anxiety (Tweet it!). Kids feel happier doing what they're doing – and happiness makes us 12 percent more productive.

 

• Substitute “Learn to chill out” for “Keep pushing”: Children are feeling stressed at younger and younger ages. Teach skills (like yoga and meditation) that enable “rest and digest” rather than “fight or flight.”

 

• Substitute “Make mistakes and learn to fail” for “Play to your strengths”:  Kids may be more optimistic in the face of challenges, knowing they can give it another try and potentially succeed in new activities.

 

• Substitute “Show compassion for others” for “Look out for Number One”: Having positive relationships with other people is essential for well being, and likability is one of the strongest predictors of success.

 
What do you typically say to kids in your life to help them be happy, successful, and resilient? Has it had the desired effect? To join the conversation, click "comments" above.

If you would like to read more about creating a habit around masterful communication, check out our book: Be Quiet, Be Heard: The Paradox of Persuasion

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